We have enjoyed these special memories from when Toby died three years ago.  My brother Alan Cannon, a dear friend of Toby's, died just a few months before Toby.  I still miss his exuberant spirit.  

Charlotte Johnston and her son Jeff

After reading many of the stories about Toby, I didn't see in the "stories" about Toby and Phyllis, their relatively short stay (starting in 1968) in Ithaca, New York when Toby worked for Ithaca Gun Company as (I assume) an accountant. It's been over 55 years now, so I hope my memory is correct, but I believe he served as the Ithaca Branch President during that stay. 

1968 was my first year at Cornell University (located in Ithaca) and I found myself a "total stranger" in the "new wave" Ivy League culture. I grew up in a small village in Southern New York and was not ready for the "standards" found acceptable at Cornell.

There I found "refuge" in the Ithaca LDS community in which I was much more comfortable than with my Cornell dormmates and fraternity brothers.  A big part of my "survival" was the Pingree's welcoming me into their home where I stayed for a summer while Toby was frequently "on the road" with his Ithaca Gun position.

 Despite the house being filled with the many Pingree children, Toby and Phyllis found a bed for me in an attic bedroom for me to stay while I worked my two summer jobs in Ithaca. I so enjoyed the close relationship with Toby, Phyllis and all their kids.  There is no better "missionary work" than being included in a devout "LDS family's" daily lives.  

Note: (I should also mention that I still remember Phyllis' tapioca pudding which is amazing.  Really, if you have never had her tapioca pudding, then you actually have never had "real tapioca pudding.")

Toby and Phyllis were instrumental in my resolving my conflict with Cornell which led me to transferring to BYU which was not only the place where I was most comfortable, but it was where I belonged. It was my own personal "This is the Place."

When you think about it, what an amazing experience, as an investigating "non-member" to have Toby, the LDS Branch President (especially one as kind, wise and spiritual as Toby) who, on occasions, would come into "my" bedroom, sit in the chair at the end of "my" bed and counsel me spiritually. 

After a year at BYU, I returned to Ithaca, rather than my hometown, to be baptized at Buttermilk Falls witnessed by my Ithaca Branch "LDS family."

Toby and Phyllis can count many more lives being brought into the Church through my two sons, both who faithfully served foreign missions, as well as the 17 grandchildren being raised in the Church by my two daughters and two sons.

I was fortunate to visit Toby and Phyllis while they lived in Walnut Creek so I could personally tell them what a huge difference they both made in my life and how I have never forgotten and how I have always treasured the kindnesses they showed me at a time when Toby and Phyllis were so important in my spiritual life.

Jay (Jason) Barber