A Letter to My Husband
Dearest Steve,
I love you to my soul. I will Always love you to my soul. I wonder if you simply grew tired of me or if you simply grew tired. I am immeasurably sorry for falling short of your expectations. I wish I had been better at reading you, better at accepting what you struggled with and what you denied like fear, failure, self...
While I don't like to use the word "hope" since it never once proved its meaning, I do "hope" you have seen God, that He has forgiven you, restored you, and embraced you in love, comfort, happiness, and peace. I sit alone here on the beach, broken, lost, and wondering what I must do now, other than the obvious. I AM happy that you're free!
Twenty years ago, I had a dream. The setting was akin to Heaven (at least my vision of it). In the dream you held my face in your hands and you said, "You're beautiful and I love you." All I ask is that you come for me someday and repeat that statement as you lead me to Paradise with God and Jesus, The Holy Spirit, and Mary and Everyone who loved us here in our flawed, frustrated, misguided human forms.
Thank you, Steve, for the time you willingly spent with me. Although you reminded me often that I saved your life, it was you who saved me, for no one was as accepting of me as you.
4U4EVER "L"
PS--I hope you finally got your answer that "God created man" and not the other way around.

Dearest Love of My Life, Steve,
Gene Grace has gone on to join you in peace and happiness. Please welcome him and show him around. I wish you could whisper to me that y'all are SO great and why God is calling all these beautiful, courageous, good souls to him while leaving us behind with the insanity that has become Earth. I don't have what it takes to fight these demons. I (and those rare few of us who never drank the Koolaid--you know who we are) need serious help. Without you I no longer see the point. At the very least I wanted to continue holding your hand while we were forced into submission. 4U4EVER Me

Dear Beautiful Soul,
I know you are still by my side. I know from the correspondence you and I have. Sometimes it is touching and wonderful. Sometimes it is dark or scary or hurtful. Tuesday night you literally scared me awake and my stomach started to hurt so bad. I demanded you return to me in love and light and joy like the spiritualists claim. You did do this and for it I am forever grateful to you. Initially I thought you were sending me a message of warning. Now I believe you were telling me that your dear friend lost his young son.
PLEASE take this teenager with you and guide him through Paradise. I do fear God and I do know He has all things worked out but I cannot help but ask why He would call such a young, hopeful, good child home so early. I want SO bad to go "home" with you but tragically, my time is unbearably very far off yet. I love you eternally and I miss you every second of every agonizing day. Please pray for me, for your friend, and for all of us who must await our homecoming in what is probably the Worst time in human history--particularly since it is humanity itself these devils are trying to abolish! 4U 4EVER L
PS I have an update on your friend whose son was called to Heaven with you. He has since reaffirmed his faith in God. This is tremendous! I am so glad to know that. It helps me to have the same intentions. I obtained many resources to assist me in affirming my faith as well. I seriously cannot wait to join you and all of my family/friends who reside in perfect Heaven.
PPS THANK YOU to God and to you for granting us such a precious little gift of a new person who will arrive in June!! I now feel so much better about my "purpose" for the future. I believe God bestowed us with what will be a beautiful being as a very special "present" because you left my life too early. I hope so much that I can be a significant part of the child's life. I love you, Steve, for all of eternity. I miss you beyond belief. I long to be reunited with you and I try to remind myself daily that this life is temporary and it won't be "long." It sure feels long but I suppose in the grand scheme, this life is but a whisper. 4U4EVER