My dad was my hero ❤️I know you can’t choose who your family is especially not your parents but if I would of had the option of picking who would make me,birth me, Raise me, Teach me all my morals and life lessons and How to be a good human being I would of choose my mom Stacy McKinley and without a doubt I would of choose Bobby McKinley to be my dad I’m so proud that I can call you my dad.  One of my very first memories of you was you and I sitting on our porch at 511 south York street watching a thunderstorm and I was scared to death of the lightning and you came and sat next to me and started to tell me how you wished you could of sat with your dad and watch thunderstorms and spend time with him while you listen to him tell you stories from when he was younger and you started to tear up and I asked you why your crying and you told me “ Erica Nicole I swear on god your life and on your moms life that I will NEVER WALK AWAY FROM YOU AND YOUR BROTHERS! I will never make promises I can’t keep and I will always be here for you and you can tell your daddy anything and I won’t judge you or tell you how wrong it is I will just listen yo you be a shoulder for you to cry on you can always count on your daddy!” I’m so angry because for the first time in my life your gone and I can’t believe it you have never been away from me and I’m pissed that there isn’t a thing I could do to bring you back I’m not going to lie I was so pissed off at you when you died because I felt like you left me you left your family but now I know I just needed someone or something to blame for you getting sick and passing I haven’t had a pleasant dream about you since you passed just nightmares some days I can’t keep it together at all and sometimes I’m doing fine but something always reminds me on the days I’m feeling ok then I start to feel like a shitty daughter for laughing or even smiling that day because your gone and I need to stop being happy that I should be in constant mourning over you but I know you would be so fucking mad at me for being a “Chi Baby” and I know you would want me to live my life for your girls but just known that your never away from my thoughts or that my entire soul and heart isn’t aching because it is I wrote this because tomorrow makes 7 months and all I want is one dream where it’s pleasant and happy and to see your face agian and to hug you and tell you im sorry for all the shitty things I have done as daughter and to be proud of me because im going to try my very hardest to not disappoint you daddy I love you so much and I miss you more and more the days don’t get any easier I have. Started to learn how to survive in life without you