Above, I already wrote my long condolence to Jan. I was sad and frankly traumatized by the fact that the Live Stream had no audio, other than the lovely pianist who played many well-known hymns before the service. Jan would have cherished that, and I, a believer and former professional pianist,  appreciated  both the talent and hymn selections. I am so sorry that I was not able to hear the choir, who I believe sang one of Jan's compositions. Had this gone differently, it would have greatly helped me find closure, as it has been 3-4 decades since I last saw her. I am trying to give all of this over to the Lord and asking him for the peace I was seeking. 

I met Jan when I was 14 years old, in Omaha Nebraska. My father, a member at Temple Baptist Church, invited her family as first time visitors for an after church lunch at our home. Within a very short time of the visit, Jan and I bonded deeply when we realized we both were classical musicians, lovers of literature and movies. That was the first day of an extremely close friendship over the past six decades. Despite the difference in ages, we were inseparable. We both moved from Omaha to other states, but always kept in touch. The last state we both lived in, in the mid-80's, was in Denver, Colorado where I lived for six years. Over that time we came to know the majority of each other’s life stories. We laughed, we cried, we both suffered many losses - of family, of dreams gone awry. She was my second longest friend and I can't imagine life without her. This past year of her sickness, which necessitated her living in facilities, was emotionally very difficult to grasp. I felt numbness from the shock of her irreversible reality, with deep grieving. Because her memory and speech was affected, her daughter, Tami, with whom I was pen pals for several years, tried to connect us over the phone a few times. I really don't know how much of me and our past closeness was strong in Jan's memory. Everything around her world at that point was confusing to me because I had no vision to see her, long-distance. Even so, I am greatly thankful for the many years I knew her. I will forever be indebted to Tami for reuniting with me and her attempts to reunite Jan and I over the phone. She is a dear friend who realized how important it was to keep me updated this last year of Jan's life. Jan is in heaven now, and I am so happy to know that she is free from the many kinds of pain she endured over the years. I hope our mansions are close to each other when I also graduate from this world that carries such mixed emotions. I am grateful for the many positive gifts that God has given me - most importantly, the close friends and family with whom I connect frequently. I miss you so much, Jan, and wish we had been given time to say goodbye under different circumstances. Your life, with all of our cherished memories, will live close to my heart forever, my dearest friend.

I will miss going across the street, to have a kabocha and visiting with Janet.  We have lot of great memories in our neighborhood getting together on the 4th of July, and other gatherings.

Jan, you were the best of friends and neighbor.  We will see you on the other side, where there is no darkness.