The man who did not see age, tribe or status.
Here I was, just arrived from Nigeria few months prior, passed my NCLEX and began working as a nurse. No friends or family ties around except for fellow job sponsor recipients of the same agency.
I had moved into my apartment and trying to settle into the system.
Getting off a bus after working a shift, I heard someone calling behind me.
It was Pastor Thoney. He introduced himself to me, subsequently went on to introduce me to his wife and that began a relationship that affected my life in many ways.Β By me meeting his family, his wife was a critical link to me meeting my husband in a manner that could have been orchestrated by God and God alone. The events are too surreal to detail.Β
All because one man chose to connect and be kind to a stranger.
His family became my family.Β Even afterΒ I got married and started my family,Β I still had the confidence to tell them I wanted to eat Sis Cecila's food and I would be obliged.Β
Your family showed up for me, every single time.
An event that marks how selfless Pastor Thoney was,Β occurred the day I went to buy my car at New Rochelle ToyotaΒ just few months after I met him.Β After closing the car purchase deal,Β I developed cold feet and couldn't drive my car off the dealership due to fear.
There was no one to call for help. I remembered Pastor Thoney and told him my dilemma.Β HeΒ got a church brother to drive him to the dealership and then drove my car home for me.
The next day, he called me out and took me on a ' know your way' trip to familiarize myself with the route to my workplace at Lincoln Hospital.Β We made the trip twice until I was comfortable to drive the car .
With Pastor Thoney, there was no age gap.Β I am just now realizing how much older than me he was. He treated me with respect.
He would "knock' on my WhatsApp in his usual jovial nature and we could talk Nigeria politics for a long time.
In him I saw a level of humility not common in many men.
He was not bashful in joking that he is a servant in his house and every other person there are his boss.Β
I would joke with him that he needs to leave NY stress and he would laugh it off thatΒ the only other travel he would do is go back to his farm in Ekiti, if the politicians would allow, " unless madam desires otherwise".
This space is not enough to talk about Bro Thoney. I could keep writing my varied encounters with a man that ALWAYS chose peace.
Pastor T ( as I called you) , how was I to know that the New Year message we exchanged would be the last?
I identify as " friend" only for clarity. You were more than a big brother to me.
This loss is too painful.Β