Tamsin Adele McIver (Tami), 80, passed away peacefully surrounded by family and friends on January 16th, 2024. Tami was an independent woman, whose primary focus and purpose was her family. She was an avid reader, often reading 2-3 books at a time, enjoyed her coffee all day long, loved gardening and Sunday crossword puzzles, was always ready for a game of cribbage and was the proud "dog mom" of Shiloh, Lucy and Mickey.

Tami was born on October 3, 1943, to George W. McIver Jr. and Mildred Wagner McIver in Mineola, NY and spent her early years in Port Washington, NY. She was the youngest in a blended family which included sister Anstiss, and brothers George III, William (Bill) and Robert (Bob) McIver and Theodore (Ted) Hendrickson. Her earliest memories revolved around their antics and trying to keep up with her siblings. Tami also loved her trips to New York City to visit her grandmother, Adelle Wagner, where she would feed squirrels and take rides on the carousel in Central Park, spend the day at the Natural History Museum, and eat oysters at the Brass Rail restaurant.

After her parents' divorce Tami moved to Greenwich CT, where she attended Greenwich Academy. She took up badminton and field hockey and found she was a good athlete and was surprised when she won awards in both sports. This time in her life was punctuated by the death of her mother when she was 15, and of her beloved grandmother a month later. Tami finished the rest of her high school years living with her stepfather and nanny, Marion Jordan, who transitioned from the role of caregiver to surrogate mother, which was a role Marion filled for Tami the remainder of her life.

After high school, Tami started at Scripps College but took time off to move to Los Angeles to help care for her father as he passed away from cancer. She then went back to college at UCLA where she earned her BA in English. After graduating she worked at Rancho La Puerta, a spa in Tecate, Mexico, which is where she met her future husband, Quin Crosbie. After their marriage they moved to Kansas where they could both attend the University of Kansas. Tami achieved her MA in English Literature and gave birth to her daughter Erica and 17 months later son, Ryan, while they lived there.

Tami moved her family back to Los Angeles and settled in Pacific Palisades. She started working in the insurance industry, in policy writing and proof reading and then as an underwriter. She eventually took a job at Frank B. Hall and worked on a team as an account assistant on a large claim for an international corporation. Tami was especially proud that she was promoted to the role of Account Executive, which was still rare for a woman in the mid 1980's. She was also proud of her ability to work and be a single mother. Tami was involved for many years at The Parish of Saint Matthew in the choir, vestry and alter guild. She hosted many large family gatherings for holidays, loved going to Dodger games, the beach, Big Bear Lake, and her children's swim meets. After an early retirement she moved to Mendocino, CA and eventually New Hampshire, to be closer to her family, and more involved with the raising of her grandsons. When they were young, she would take them to feed the ducks at Swazey Park, and as they grew, she attended all school or sporting events, grandparents' luncheons, and always loved hosting dinner and movie nights with all four of her grandsons in attendance.

Tami moved to the Exeter Mill in 2017 where she made many wonderful friends, who were so supportive of her, especially in her final year as her health declined.

Tami struggled with chronic health issues her entire life, but never let her illnesses define her or slow her down. She was always quick to make friends and engage in hilarious banter with perfect strangers. The trait she was most proud of was her sense of humor, which was a healthy mix of intelligent insight, dry wit, and deep sarcasm. She was a woman who never stopped learning and had a keen sense of adventure. Tami became an accomplished woodworker (with a full workshop at her home), she earned her real estate license, and loved watching the birds and wildlife. Tami loved the symphony, theater, museums and traveled extensively, including Chile, Peru, Canada, Italy, France, England, Alaska, Costa Rica, Galapagos, throughout the US and Eastern Europe (to name just a few). She fostered this same love of travel in her children and grandchildren.

Tami should be remembered as a loving mother, grandmother, sister, and friend who thrived when helping others through tough times. She struggled with her own troubled adolescence but was ready with a quick joke to lighten the mood or a warm embrace to comfort those in need.

Tami is survived by her daughter, Erica Crosbie McClelland, and son in law, Jeremy McClelland, her son, Ryan Crosbie, and daughter in law, Carmen Villaseca- Crosbie, her four grandsons Connor Smith, Shea Smith, Alex Crosbie-Villaseca and Christopher Crosbie-Villaseca. She also leaves her brother, Ted Hendrickson, of Fort Lauderdale, FL. Her interment will be at The Green-Wood Cemetery in Brooklyn, NY later this spring, where she will be placed in the family plot with her beloved mother and grandmother.

A celebration of life is scheduled for February 3, 2024, at 1:00 at the Exter Mills Clubroom, 6 Chestnut St, Exeter NH. Please bring memories to share. 

Send to someone

Share this obituary with others

https://everloved.com/life-of/tamsin-mciver/obituary/

Copy