Surya Kumar Venkata Gullapalli
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Surya's obituary
Surya Kumar Gullapalli passed away on March 16th 2023, Thursday.
Kumar was and will always be remembered as an enthusiastic, lovable and jovial human being with worldviews that were not comprehensible to an emotional mind. He got to the core of the matter with hard logic and dealt with it at that level directly. This approach may look and sound harsh to the rest of us. But this is exactly what helped him in his journey with cancer and with his increasing pain especially these last few years of his life.
One of his favourite quotes was:
Uthsaaham Saahasam Dhairyam Budhi Sakthi Paraakramam;
Shadethe Yathra Vadanthi Thathra Thistami Devatha
“Enthusisam (uthsaaham) , effort (saahasam) , courage (dhairyam) , intelligence (buddhih) , resourcefulness (saktih) and perseverance (parakramah) – where these six qualities exist , there one will find God.”
Kumar believed that the #1 quality a person should cultivate is enthusiasm. Then came effort. And then came courage. The final three... Intelligence, resourcefulness and perseverance were always qualities that were important but not as important as enthusiasm, effort and courage. He was an embodiment of all these qualities in that very order.
No human being is perfect and neither was Kumar. But one can also say that imperfection is a part of being human. And Kumar believed so too. He willingly accepted his mistakes if he was wrong and was clearly aware of his imperfections. But no matter the flaws - he will always remain our perfect dad.
He was a follower of Advaita Vedanta and Hindu Dharma. He believed in the interconnected one-ness of all of us but also understood the unique-ness of an individual. Above all he placed duties and responsibilities above rights which is the spirit of Dharma.
When it came to the matter of us taking care of him in his final days, he made it absolutely clear how he wanted to be taken care of. He knew exactly at what points we as a family would face 'dharma sankatanalu' or moral dillemas. And he had already given us clear instructions many months before on how to navigate all the tough choices we would have to make for him. When you encounter a person with this level of clarity in their life, you have no choice but to follow their lead.
Two years before doctors gave him the cancer prognosis, Kumar shared his thoughts on how one should deal with death and pain. This is what he had to say "This is the way to go.... Live life doing what you like and when the inevitable comes along, accept gracefully and don't prolong unnecessarily."
And this is how he chose to go as well. On his own terms. Uncompromising. Till the very end.
He was a die-hard foodie and loved cooking for everyone. He enjoyed spending time with every single one of his family and friends. Eccentric, lovable and jovial - this is how we will remember Kumar forever.
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