It is incredibly challenging to come to terms with Ananda not being with us. After hearing the news, I have let my fond memories take center stage. I'll try to put them into words (albeit with limitations).
Immediately after landing at Kolkata airport, Ananda would ensure his loved ones knew it was that time of the year! A time when we would squeeze in our usual tasks between episodes of fun-filled get-togethers, movie nights and dining out.
As a kid, I would look forward to when Ananda was in town. He had a particular way of convincing Ma to let me miss tuition classes to watch a movie or accompany him to a new cuisine he wanted to try. He was a true reflection of his name (as Chandreyee mentioned).
My memories often transport me to those warm summer evenings at his Chetla apartment, where the rooms would come alive with the laughter and chatter of family, friends, and loved ones who gathered to share food, stories, and each other's company. He made it a point that everyone was well-engaged in conversations, and nobody felt left out or overlooked. He always pampered everyone with gifts, restaurant treats, shopping, movie trips, and more.
He would only settle for the best arrangements when he took everyone out for a movie. Gold class seats with recliners, popcorn, and snacks during the intervals (he loved the theater momo selection). His strategy to convince everyone was unparalleled -- he would call and mention that he had already booked the tickets. 100% attendance guaranteed! However, there was significant variation in the choice of the film we would watch - from entertaining Bollywood blockbusters to thought-provoking Oscar-nominated films that linger in your mind. Because of him, I watched two of the best Oscar-winning feature films in Kolkata -- Spotlight and Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri. A classic was when he would eventually doze off and snore during the movie. When woken up, he would smartly say that he had been watching all along.
In Kolkata, one of his favorite foods was Calcutta-style momo. Our common favorite. He would tag me along and end up at Blue Poppy at the Sikkim house. We would order a wide selection of pan-fried, steamed and half and half's (kothays, if I'm not wrong). One time, he was admitted to a hospital in Kolkata for some health issues. The food served at the hospital was vegetarian. Upon discharge, he picked me up, and before too long, we were waiting outside Blue Poppy. The owner noticed he still had an IV channel on his hand. She promptly told him, "No red meat for you!" His response was, "Oh no! You don't get it. My doctor told me to have more protein." That did the trick.
Cut to 2019. I am traveling to the US to obtain my Ph.D. As my semester was nearing Fall break, I got a call from Sumana. Sumana and Ananda are flying down to Atlanta to meet up with me (a two-hour train ride from my place). Those couple of days were just a whole different level. Christmas came early that year. From trying French cuisine for the first time to going on a shopping spree. Sumana and Ananda had one question for me, "What do you need?" Before too long, I had a bag filled with stuff, from jackets to T-shirts to gloves to chargers, and the list goes on. The tricky question was how I could bring all that back to Clemson. Ananda had the perfect solution, "Take my suitcase!" He added, "I bought this in Kolkata a long time back with Sugata." It feels strange since, as I am writing this, I can glimpse the suitcase in the corner of my dresser.
Ananda eventually made a trip back to India in the winter of 2019. I would get regular updates through WhatsApp from Ma. However, his health started deteriorating during that time. Upon coming back to Canada, the pandemic-induced slowdown hit him. One good thing that emerged was we started having regular phone calls. One of his favorite questions was, "What are you cooking for dinner?" Then, we would discuss different cuisines and what wine goes best with them. And then there was the obvious question, "Do you have a girlfriend?" or "Didn't you have one in Kolkata?" It was so funny that he always asked it regardless of the conversation.
When asked how he was doing, he would never mention any of the hardships he was going through. "I am doing good. How are you? How is Ma doing? Do you call her regularly?"-- a classic way of sauntering off to other topics. However, with time, the answer changed. In 2022, he mentioned that he was not doing well. For the first time, we had a conversation about his health. He was tired.
Over the past 5 years or so, our relationship changed. We grew closer and became friends. He would share how he felt about many things- a sort of confidence grew between us where we could talk about personal stuff. He would ask about my plans and guide me to better opportunities. One thing was common in our conversations, "Godot, look after your parents! They have supported you throughout." The day I left Kolkata to come to the US, he called Ma and provided emotional support. Such a sweetheart!
I remember our last conversation back in December. I never thought that would be the last time I would hear him speak. He was going through a lot at that point and was feeling helpless.
Ananda, more than an uncle (technically grand-uncle) you'll always be a friend who looked out for me. I am sorry you had to endure all the hardships and challenges. I know you're in a better realm now, surrounded by all who loved you. You'll be missed! May everyone find comfort and peace as they mourn your passing. Thank you for making a difference!
Godot
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