I wanted to send some thoughts about the twins when I got the news about Russ. Losing both of these guys was a real gut punch for me. My 1st thought was what a friend who went to Mo State with them said to me this week. “These were great looking guys who happened to be the nicest people I’ve ever met.” (great haircuts)!

We were older and didn’t see them a lot but did hear about some of their accomplishments. One of mine was coaching teams during the 80’s that were good but became almost unbeatable when the Sikes boys joined. We had virtually an entire Family lineup that was so good it was difficult to put together a batting order. One championship game was pretty tight when Ray or Russ (could hardly ever tell them apart) came up mid-game and with one smooth stroke drove one over dead center that opened it up for us. I always admired their talent and natural ability. (you have to have talent in this family)! We hung it up for a few years when I was talked into putting it back together for one last run. We went 15-0, still one of my proudest accomplishments. Doing it with family made it that much better.

The second was the family picnic at the Farm that we all loved for Grandma & Grandpa’s 50th (I think?) Great day of good food (Grandma’s cooking!) and volleyball. Just being at that place always made me feel good.

Another, years ago when I started college, went in as a total jock but soon adopted the hippy lifestyle. Went to family Christmas where Jack and the twins were kind of giving me a hard time about my hair. Some years’ later I saw a picture of them and their basketball Championship with long hair. Klnd of get a chuckle out of that.

I’ll always remember how friendly and happy they were to see us and how many have commented how genuinely they were interested in what you had to say. Wish there were more like that today.

Finally my dad who followed a lot of their games would be sad but hopefully will meet up with them in a better place. Our thoughts are with the family.

hello this is  stephen smith i’m the oldest one  within my siblings of my brother garrett and my sisters Kaitlin urwin and lauren drapal which russ knew them as a smith as well and also our parents sally smith and mike smith we have known  the sikes family within Beth sikes  my friend which i call my brother Ryan sikes kevin’s cousin i’ve loved Russ so much i got do a lot of stuff within my best friend Russ  he is a godly man that he loved both of his kids and his son  Kevin and also his beautiful Daughter lauren and we got too know. and we also know Carol sikes as well. i like too take a moment too share a little memory about Russ  where when he coached kevin’s basketball team against my brothers  basketball team and whenever he saw my brother he would always too tell kevin too cover the shooter that’s my brother garrett we all love u  Russ i know u are in a better place and i love u too Russ i know u are ok you are with our lord up there 

RIP Russ please never forget too knock off concrete shoes and make sure u always Call z ball and move z feet 

Have known Russ and Ray since Junior High School.  We have not seen each other in some time, but know that Russ was making and impact in others lives and building a family he was so proud of!! That was just the kind of person he has always been.  Thoughts and prayers for his family, and friends. 

Craig

As I reflect on what to share here, I keep returning to a letter I wrote to my dad for Father’s Day 2024. At the time, I sensed it might be our last one together. The letter was part of a legacy project as I prepare rites of passage for my own sons — a way to honor Dad and reflect on all he’s poured into my life. It captures what I want the world to know about him.

_________

Hey Dad,

As we have begun talking more from a perspective of reflection, I wanted to take the time to let you know how meaningful, encouraging, and impactful your fatherhood has been to me. In short, I am glad you conquered your fear of fatherhood, because you did an amazing job with both me and Lauren. I hope you are incredibly proud of what you have done as a parent.

In A Road Map to Financial Freedom and Philanthropy [A mini book that Dad wrote] you call back to your and Uncle Ray’s principles for leading your children. I thought they would be a good way to frame the rest of this letter:

Teach and model faith

Theologian A.W. Tozer wrote “What comes into our minds when we think about God is the most important thing about us”. You led me in this truth. That God is the beginning and the end, the Alpha and the Omega. And that pursuing all things that He made to be true, noble, and beautiful is worth the quest. While I know you have shared a lack of confidence in your own biblical knowledge and socialization within the church, I can assure you that through your discipling from Grandpa Nickle and UR - you were very effective in showing me and teaching me that God is important and that He matters a great deal to our time here on earth. You gave me every opportunity to grow deeper in my faith through supporting my time in Sunday School, VBS programs, all the way to youth groups. I am now so glad that our conversations around faith have continued into my adulthood as I have stepped into the role of elder, and office that Grandpa Nickle once held too. I am thankful that you led a home that provided a cornerstone for my faith formation to be trusted to lead in this way. Thank you for teaching and modeling faith for me.

Teach and model work ethic

From the earliest opportunity you taught me that you can create opportunities for yourself by determining how hard you are going to work at something. Whether that be being excellent at a job to put money in the bank account, to improving your vertical on the basketball court, or pounding out a script for a silly Power Rangers movie, there is a joy in the journey of getting to the things we want and a dignity in finding a way to provide for the things we need. I saw this modeled in how you handled so many things behind the scenes for our family, endeavoring at your day job, in coaching, and in the restaurant business. And ultimately, how you pursued me in my challenges with vision therapy and my neurological uniqueness. You were not idle by any means. Helping your family to thrive was the code you ran on. Even as your health situation has changed, you haven’t stopped showing work ethic in how you have read to understand topics that benefit us every day. You have showed me that education never stops, and that the mind is something we should be trying to grow every day. Thank you for teaching and modeling for me work ethic.

Teach and model financial discipline

Considering you wrote a guide to this topic, I can’t think of many more dads who have been more intentional in following this principle than you. You exemplified for me the notion that money is like a brick. It is amoral. You can use it to build a house for you, build a house for someone else, or simply just throw it through a window. The more we get, the more it makes us more of what we already are. For all the stories of money being something that divides families, you have led us with a plan and confidence that has helped us avoid that strife. You have given me a model that I aspire to. Thank you for teaching and modeling for me financial discipline.

Teach and model philanthropy

The word for philanthropy comes from the Greek root for “love of fellow man” and you modeled this for me and guided me to so many opportunities. Showing me how to love unique members of our family, giving UR a place to stay in his time of need - but also helping him know when it seemed his safety net was becoming a hammock and helping him move to his next step. You supported me in taking off work in the summer to serve at MDA Camp, which in my opinion, prepared me for fatherhood more than any singular experience in my life. And in this present era - you have been my number one thinking partner in Shepherds Sports, which I believe God is going to bless in such a special way in connecting families to the local church. You have shown me how to be a great man who goes out towards others with love, not just a good man who plays it safe. Thank you for teaching and modeling for me philanthropy.

In conclusion, there isn’t really enough paper in the world for me to write out all good stuff you gave me that I will get to give my boys and any future children, but I will wrap up this letter on Father’s Day 2024 with this thought. One of my favorite bands re-released the album that sent them mainstream. On this collection of songs is one called Meant to Live. On the first release, the guitars and drums make it a bit of a head banger and one I loved as a high schooler. I never really thought about the words then. On the new edition, though, a musician known for his powerful vocals and understated instrumentation took a turn with it and has made something that truly makes me weepy as I think about you. The lyrics go:

Dreaming about providence

And whether mice or men have second tries

Maybe we've been living with our eyes half open

Maybe we're bent and broken

Broken

We were meant to live for so much more

Have we lost ourselves?

Somewhere we live inside

Somewhere we live inside

Dad - I remain amazed at how you broke the cycle of so much pain for me. That the sins of man which have touched your head and heart in ways that my nearly 32 years cannot understand, and that my guarded life cannot fathom. You have told me that your pride in what Lauren and I have become is a sort of “providence” for you, and it brings me joy to know that. I am so proud of you for finding the spirit of fatherhood that God put inside of you and lived it out for so much more than what you thought you were capable of on your worst days. You were meant to live for so much more, and for so much more you have lived through the grace of our Savior, Jesus Christ. As we celebrate you, let us conclude with the words of the great apostle, Paul, who reminds us that our God is the author of generational legacy.

20 Now to Him who is able to do above and beyond all that we ask or think according to the power that works in us— 21 to Him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus to all generations, forever and ever. Amen.

Ephesians 3:20-21

I would choose you every time!

Your loving son,

Kevin

P.S. Nuggets of Wisdom For My Kids That I Learned From My Dad

• The best way to get to know people is to get them talking about themselves
• No one cares how much you know, until they know how much you care
• Begin with end in mind
• Education creates opportunity. You can always be a Walmart Greeter, but without the right education, you can’t do anything but be a Walmart Greeter.

It’s hard to find the right words to express what a wonderful man Russ was and the profound impact he had on my life. Growing up just a few streets away, the Sikes household was a second home to me, and Russ was a constant, supportive presence.

So many of my most formative memories have Russ at the center of them. First and foremost, he was Coach Sikes. On the basketball court, the baseball diamond, and every other field, he was shaping us into more than just athletes; he was shaping us into good people. He taught us that character was paramount. If you weren't a good sport, you didn't play. He instilled in us that a firm handshake with the opponent, win or lose, was the mark of true strength. I vividly remember being on some truly terrible baseball teams with Kevin, the kind where we'd lose by 20 runs and half the team was more interested in the nachos in the dugout. It never mattered to Russ. He would pour just as much time and energy into the kids who struggled, because he knew he wasn't just coaching a game; he was impacting a life.

His dedication was legendary. I don't know of any other youth sports coach who would spend his evenings watching other elementary school teams play just to write up detailed scouting reports for us. He would print out binders of information on our opponents, pointing out who had a weak left-handed dribble or which batter tended to swing at the first pitch. Looking back, I realize this incredible effort wasn't just about winning a game. It was a masterclass in dedication. He was showing us, through his own actions, what it meant to pour your whole heart into something. He taught us that the little things matter, and that showing up with your absolute best effort is a victory in itself.

I’ll never forget one basketball practice where my fiery spirit got the better of me. After a teammate (legally) blocked my shot, I got so angry that I chased him down and tackled him. I was mortified and braced myself for a lecture. But Russ handled it with such grace that still amazes me. He didn’t yell. He calmly separated us, talked me down, and helped me understand and manage my emotions. He had this incredible gift for turning a negative moment into a profound lesson. As adults, he would often bring up that story and we’d laugh about it, a perfect example of how he could transform a moment of shame into a fond memory of growth.

Then there was Russ, the Executive Producer of "Hunky Spunky Productions." When Kevin and I were consumed by our filmmaking dreams, Russ was our biggest supporter. When a scene required both of us to be on screen, he was always the man behind the camera. He didn't just tolerate our creative chaos; he actively enabled it. He bought a camera, editing software, and even painted a bedroom wall that famously ugly bright green so we could have a proper green screen, complete with a row of lights he installed himself. When we finished our hour-long "feature film," he reviewed the script, provided snacks for our "crew," and was our most enthusiastic audience. I can still hear his booming, over-the-top laugh at every single joke, no matter how bad it was. That encouragement was the fuel that kept us creating. He never offered a word of criticism, only support.

As I got older, I came to know and appreciate another one of Russ’s superpowers: his profound ability to listen. When you spoke with him, he was completely present. He leaned in, asked questions, and made you feel like you were the only person in the room. He had a gift for making people feel heard and valued. In a crowded room, I’d often see him gravitate not to the center of attention, but to the corner where someone was standing alone, striking up a conversation that would last for ages. His purpose was to support others.

As an adult, I’ve also come to understand the sheer depth of his love for his family. He had the wisdom to see the adults his children would become and the courage to make the tough, selfless choices necessary to help them get there. In everything he did, he always put their future well-being above all else. It was the kind of profound, sacrificial love that only becomes clear with the perspective of adulthood.

I am a better man for having known Russ Sikes. He taught me how to handle failure, how to channel my energy for good, and how to see the value in giving my all. His legacy isn't just in the family he built, but in the countless kids like me that he coached, mentored, and unconditionally supported. Thank you, Russ, for the incredible mark you left on my life. You will be so deeply missed.

With deepest sympathy and love,

Brian Schwabauer