Cindy’s birthday dinner — with Bob

Bob was always special. We were close for years, and I miss those days and times. He was there when my oldest was born and I’ll always remember that moment when he first held her as I remember our softball games and the apartment on e76th. 

Bobby was my big cousin, always looked up to him as the cool guy who lived down Gardiners Avenue in Levittown with a drum set my dad Bernie create a logo for.  Can't leave out the water bed.  My brother Ben and I got to see him every once in a while when we were kids.  I do remember hanging out with Shelly and Bobby watching the Beatles on Ed Sullivan at our house - might have been some constraints back at Wisp Lane.  Some connect times over the years at some weddings but got more time to connect with him over the past bunch of years, spanning the passing of both of our fathers, Mel and Bernie.  We typically spoke or setup a zoom call after I would text him to check in during hurricanes, since the houses seemed to be in target areas.  We were lucky to have him stay with us after my pops funeral and he spent some solid time with my kids and wife, which was really great.  He was still my big cousin - funny, goofy, and genuinely interested in a ton of stuff.  I will miss him.

Simply put, I’ve known Bob as far back as I can remember (along with Andrew and Evan). Four of us. All of our lives. 4 brothers from different Mothers and Fathers. The thought of it being 3 just never entered into the equation.  I think that says what I want to convey. 

I met Bob when we were both doctoral students in NY. He was 25 and I was 32. We had very different upbringing, culture, and language backgrounds. At the time I met him we were attending a sociolinguistics class where he was the only non-bilingual student. I found him charming, funny, intense, and willing to try new experiences. I remember his contagious smile and his loud laugh at his own jokes. He showed me his special eating places in the city including food trucks and hole-in-the-wall dinners. I told him about my childhood years in my native country. Soon Bob was traveling to Peru to learn himself about its treasures! While Bob had only learned a few Spanish words, he was at ease communicating with natives by reading their cues, gesturing, and joining in laugh. In one occasion, Bob had the entire public bus cheering for him. In the middle of the Andes, at the amazement of the locals, he jumped into an icy lake completely dressed! As a young adult and later in life, Bob entered and moved easily across different groups of people. He thrived to connect with others in amazing ways... always having fun while living life to its fullest!