On September 19, 2024, our boy, Paul "Xander" Alexander Strain,  lost his life when we were not at home in an accident while with a distracted caretaker.  Xander was such a bright spirit, and so full of life, the world seems not right without him. From the bottom of our hearts, we thank those who have kept us alive and moving through their support the last six months -- our families, friends, neighbors, teachers, nurses, doctors, acquaintances -- whether you helped with arrangements, gave us a  kind word or hug, took a walk, or cooked a meal. 

Xander was born on December 19, 2021. He lived his much too brief, life vibrantly with his unstoppable, fearless, and courageous spirit. He brought us so much joy. Xander left a loving, now incomplete, family behind. He was our miracle baby. He overcame a blood disorder in utero and as a newborn during the COVID-19 pandemic, and become a perfectly normal toddler. He was named after his father, Paul David Strain, and the doctor Dr. Ahmet Alexander Bashat at Johns Hopkins' Center for Fetal Therapy. The medical team there performed lifesaving blood transfusions countless times even before Xander was born. Xander leaves behind his siblings: Carl Strain (14, Aspen, CO), Milan Ertogan (13, currently of Washington, DC), Essie Strain (12, Aspen, CO), Robert "Bertie" Strain (6, Aspen, CO), and Jack Strain (5, Aspen, CO). They all adored him; the littlest boys called him "their baby".

In July 2024, we moved to Aspen, Colorado. Xander loved rolling and riding down the hills in our backyard on Danielson Drive with our dogs Blitzen and Dancer. He loved putting his feet in Herron Park's cold stream until he probably couldn't feel them. He loved sitting with Jack and Bertie atop the play structure at Herron Park, the Yellow Brick Playground's tall slide and the Molar in downtown Aspen and refusing to come down.  He loved getting soaked at the splash park at Willits with Essie. Mostly, he loved just being a part of our big, messy family. 

Xander was so full of life, with such a bright spirit, that he was unstoppable when he wanted to do something. What he wanted most of all was to be a big boy like his brothers. He also mostly ate just Merkt's spread cheese with crackers, powdered Hostess donuts, and popsicles. Xander loved anything he could drive that went fast. 

Xander's life was cut so short we don't yet know how to live without him. We want his memory to live on in the hearts of those who loved him. With that in mind, we are raising money for Pathfinders, Allison Daily's organization that kept us alive, together, and functioning, as a family in our grief, so that they may provide support to others who are facing traumatic grief or the loss of a child. 

We are also creating a fund for memorials of Xander -- in the places he lived and loved -- Aspen, CO; Washington, DC; Minocqua, WI; and/ or Russell, PA -- so that Xander's parents and siblings, our extended families, our friends, and anyone else who loved him, can visit and remember our Xander and enjoy the outdoors.  Please, let Xander's spirit always remind you to:

Never, never, never give up,

Never compromise what you truly want,

Live this short, short life in the fullest way you can, and

Cherish every minute showing those you love just how much you love them. 

Do it for Xander.

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