Nancy, I remember the delight I felt when I met you in 1985. Five people, 3 under six, during the winter, living in a rented, furnished 2 bedroom apartment in Colorado Springs. We were waiting on the construction of our home in Briargate to be completed. I was 25 and I was lonely. One night around 10 pm, what had previously been silent nights changed. Suddenly, in the apartment upstairs, there muffled giggles and shrieks mixed with what any parent would recognize as multiple tiny feet and adults shushing. Surely, there were a least as many children as I had! The next morning our families simultaneously exited our apartments. Nancy, Henry, Erin, Micheal and Kelly descended the stairs. Parked right in front of my door, pared side by side, were our almost identical mini vans. Indeed, there were as many of you as there were of us. And, you were also there, waiting for your home under construction to be finished, just a few blocks from where ours was being built. A Godsend.
I count that day, when I met you Nancy and your beautiful family as one of the most fortuitous days of my life. Nancy you were ( and remain) a godsend friend. I had always had difficulty making friends yet, I felt that acceptance immediately, Your friendship was like air to me. I cannot count the number of times over the years that you helped me breathe. You, Nancy were the person I could tell anything and feel safe. That safety didn’t come from your ability to say the perfect thing, or even do anything in particular. You were safe because you didn’t have to like or agree with me to love me in such a pure way that my soul felt like it had a home. It is said that friends are ones chosen family. I was blessed to be chosen by you Nancy. I imagine there are countless others who have had their own experience of home with with you too.
We laughed! A lot! As the years passed, we shared our hopes and dreams and our disappointments and inside jokes. We encouraged each other and listened and laughed and cried when we had to eat crow or because what we thought best for others was set aside and sometimes proven wrong. We helped each other hold on. And, we helped each other let go. Even through multiple moves for each of us we remained fast friends. Even when life got crazy and we didn’t talk daily, we managed to remain close when far away.
Nancy, more than once you shared with me how you felt that you had never done anything with your life. That you felt you didn’t make a difference. Never accomplished anything. Yet, here we are, everyone visiting this page, everyone making plans to come together to celebrate your life and morn your physical absence. We are all products of you, Nancy Baird. We were your work in this world. Loving us in all our differences and flaws, meeting us where we are is a huge accomplishment not many in this world could or would achieve. Often those who are truly beautiful, truly great cannot see themselves clearly. Nancy, you saw us. You had a hard time seeing yourself. Nancy, you lived this truth so eloquently written in The Little Prince: "It is only in the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye.”
Nancy you had eyes for the essential. Your heart held mine so gently. I know mine wasn’t the only one.
Nancy your light shines on. It is not gone. It lives on in your children and grandchildren. Your light lives on through Henry, your siblings and extended family. You live on through your friends and even in the people who met you that you never knew their names. I look for your bright shining light among the stars now. I believe this loosely quoted passage from― Antoine de Saint-Exupéry in The Little Prince, to be true of you Nancy. “In one of those stars you shall be living. In one of them you shall be laughing. And so it will be as if all the stars are laughing. When I look at the sky at night my sorrow is comforted. I am content that I have known you. You will always be my friend.”
Nancy, may the seeds you planted in all of our hearts be watered and warmed and grow by our ability to take what you have given us and allow it spread and to bloom in the world. May you see the exquisite fruits of your presence in this world continue on in our lives. May the connections we all felt with you remain always. Nancy, the unexpected blessing of having you missing from this earth is that now none of us need to wait our turn to talk to you on the phone! We now have direct lines with no call waiting, no voicemails and no interruptions! I know I am not the only one happy about that little nugget of joy.
Nancy you had a favorite quote from Mother Teresa’s “ANYWAY poem. “Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough; Give the world the best you've got anyway. ( and your favorite part) You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and your God; It was never between you and them anyway.”
Nancy, you saw the light of God in each of us. Living that faith was between you and God. We were the lucky beneficiaries. Thank you doesn’t cover my gratitude. I am hoping following your example might. I love you Nancy. Expect frequent calls!
Share with others
Donate in memory
