Memories of Melanie Marie Gould

judy vasos

Remembering Mel always & forever.

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Mona Ram

Dear Melanie:

I forgot you were dead

Only 2 months ago I began my morning with a wide sigh Ohhh Melanie,. . where and when my heart met with my image of you and the yearning for, My Confidante! My Confidante; the word I found most fitting to describe our friendship.

You were a friend of my daughter Shree. You both developed a fond admiration for each other, a society of 2 sort, that endured throughout.

There was this uncertainty, mostly because of the mix of my individual character and personality and the unknown dynamic which allowed Shree to

Question within her remark: "you'll really get along with Melanie or you won't ".

Reflecting back on our relationship , Melanie became one of the most trusting souls I've ever met. Her "worldly" met mine, culturally, generationally combined with the available and accessible large slices of random humor and a backbone made of compassion. The recipe for a genuine growing friendship.

She was a great listener;

Phone call conversations were lengthy

I could disclose the dark tales and she could and would give the best constructive criticism and insights, or not.

Her generosity and trust extended toward reciprocity:with me helping her organize, edit and bury, while listening to her reflect on past challenges and her own personal history.

These days when there are no more peers available to talk with, for me, but one, I think 'they are not Melanie'. There are the few; they are younger, wonderful brilliant friends of mine. But they aren't Melanie, nor were they meantt to be.

Although I'm not sad, I'm pissed, I can hear her say "I'm fine I'm fine" in her staccato like repitition.

So today when I forgot you were dead, (I can hear your chuckle) I will embrace our belief in the Grace of God, in you and cherish our endearing friendship and know that you are indeed 'just fine".

Thanks Melanie for everything.

Always from love to you,

Mona

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Linda Patch

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Linda Patch

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Linda Patch

Melanie’s Art

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Linda Patch

Melanie’s Art

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Linda Patch

Melanie’s Art

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Linda Patch

Melanie’s Art - Her cards & postcards always made my day!

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Irene Kane

From Pete Bogdanos:

Wow...I'm so grateful to you for taking the time to make sure those items (Melanie's cards) reached me. I would always give Mel a bad time about all of the glitter. NOT that I minded her humour and the mess, but it was just getting too difficult for me to clean up the mess! So i asked her very politely to not send glitter anymore.

A couple of the cards you sent had references to that. I couldn't help but laugh, and cry a little bit.

I, like so many, have so many little things and knick knacks that Mel had given to me over the years.

Here at DOR (yeh..still here)..I have about 20 cards and things, like Brown Jelly Beans with a note saying "Don't eat the Reindeer Turds" or something. I've had that for about the last 10-12 years. Still makes me laugh. I'm glad I kept most everything that Mel had given or sent me. Now that she's gone, they're great reminders of what a good soul and good friend she was to me and to everyone. Really loved her very much.

Hope all is well, and you're enjoying life. Hoping to make the celebration for Mel when it happens, so hopefully we see each other there.

Thanks again for sending the cards. I'm sure Mel is smiling about the fact that I've seen them now!

Best to you, Pete

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Emily Sullivan

Awww, thanks Pete. Thanks for sharing that’s awesome to hear Awww, thanks Pete. Thanks for sharing that’s awesome to hear Awww, thanks Pete. Thanks for sharing that’s awesome... Read more

Pete Bogdanos

This is Pete....I want to add, after Melanie retired, I would sometimes hire her for 10-15 hours a week to help with projects at the Division of Research, where I sometimes needed a little extra help.  She just wanted to get out of the house and do something, and make a few bucks for fun.  She always had her way of doing things.  When I'd tell her, "When you make a note on any of the forms use a Post-It and use a ball point pen and write clearly, so I can read it..."  I told her this many times, but she seemed to go out of her way to use a Pink or Blue Highlighting Felt Pen to write these notes,  I'm guessing, just to "mess" with me!!  Most of the time I couldn't read what she wrote.  I'd have to ask her "What does this note say Mel?", to which she'd reply with something like, "Can't read it?  Well, next time I'll write it in Greek for you so you'll be able to read it!"   We'd always have a good laugh.  Melanie also knew I loved music and collected records.  She called me one day and invited over to the old Pharmacy her dad owned on 73rd Avenue.  She was getting rid of things and asked me if I'd like to look through all of the old 78 records, that were in stacks, in different areas of the front floor.  I came over and before I knew it..not only was I going through the records, but also moving boxes, and cleaning stuff, and taking stuff out to the dumpster.  I came home that day covered in soot and dust, and still, to this day, have a box of the old 78s, which I treasure, which she gave me.  She'd always ask me, "You still got my dad's 78s" when I would see or talk to her.  She loved that they were not thrown away, but now safe and appreciated and in my collection.  I really miss how kind and quirky and funny she was.  Always had a shoulder for me, and was always one who understood my point of view on some things, even though we didn't always agree.  This is really what true friends are about.  I'm thankful to have known her for over 20 years!!   One last thing, I did get a chance to meet Aunt Clyde, when I visited 73rd Avenue that day.  She was only about 92 or 93 at the time, but Mel would always give me updates starting with something like, "Well, she just turned 97 and she's still driving!"  So funny!!  Since Melanie has passed, I find myself now, like I'm sure many are doing, spending time looking at all of the things she's given me.  Even here by my computer at home, I have a little toy which is from some kiddie show, where the character is sitting in a rocket ship.  Astro Boy or something.  I remember her giving it to me, and her saying, "Even at your age, you need some toys to play with." (I was probably in my mid-40s, and just turned 60 this last year!)  And yes, I do sometimes roll it around and play with it and will continue to do so in the future, in her honor!   We all know she was "one of a kind", and that's the least I can do for her!!

This is Pete....I want to add, after Melanie retired, I would sometimes hire her for 10-15 hours a week to... Read more help with projects at the Division of Research, where I sometimes needed a little extra help. She just wanted to get out of the house and do something, and make a few bucks for fun. She always had her way of doing things. When I'd tell her, "When you make a note on any of the forms use a Post-It and use a ball point pen and write clearly, so I can read it..." I told her this many times, but she seemed to go out of her way to use a Pink or Blue Highlighting Felt Pen to write these notes, I'm guessing, just to "mess" with me!! Most of the time I couldn't read what she wrote. I'd have to ask her "What does this note say Mel?", to which she'd reply with something like, "Can't read it? Well, next time I'll write it in Greek for you so you'll be able to read it!" We'd always have a good laugh. Melanie also knew I loved music and collected records. She called me one day and invited over to the old Pharmacy her dad owned on 73rd Avenue. She was getting rid of things and asked me if I'd like to look through all of the old 78 records, that were in stacks, in different areas of the front floor. I came over and before I knew it..not only was I going through the records, but also moving boxes, and cleaning stuff, and taking stuff out to the dumpster. I came home that day covered in soot and dust, and still, to this day, have a box of the old 78s, which I treasure, which she gave me. She'd always ask me, "You still got my dad's 78s" when I would see or talk to her. She loved that they were not thrown away, but now safe and appreciated and in my collection. I really miss how kind and quirky and funny she was. Always had a shoulder for me, and was always one who understood my point of view on some things, even though we didn't always agree. This is really what true friends are about. I'm thankful to have known her for over 20 years!! One last thing, I did get a chance to meet Aunt Clyde, when I visited 73rd Avenue that day. She was only about 92 or 93 at the time, but Mel would always give me updates starting with something like, "Well, she just turned 97 and she's still driving!" So funny!! Since Melanie has passed, I find myself now, like I'm sure many are doing, spending time looking at all of the things she's given me. Even here by my computer at home, I have a little toy which is from some kiddie show, where the character is sitting in a rocket ship. Astro Boy or something. I remember her giving it to me, and her saying, "Even at your age, you need some toys to play with." (I was probably in my mid-40s, and just turned 60 this last year!) And yes, I do sometimes roll it around and play with it and will continue to do so in the future, in her honor! We all know she was "one of a kind", and that's the least I can do for her!! Read less This is Pete....I want to add, after Melanie retired, I would sometimes hire her for 10-15 hours a week to help with projects ... Read moreat the Division of Research, where I sometimes needed a little extra help. She just wanted to get out of the house and do something, and make a few bucks for fun. She always had her way of doing things. When I'd tell her, "When you make a note on any of the forms use a Post-It and use a ball point pen and write clearly, so I can read it..." I told her this many times, but she seemed to go out of her way to use a Pink or Blue Highlighting Felt Pen to write these notes, I'm guessing, just to "mess" with me!! Most of the time I couldn't read what she wrote. I'd have to ask her "What does this note say Mel?", to which she'd reply with something like, "Can't read it? Well, next time I'll write it in Greek for you so you'll be able to read it!" We'd always have a good laugh. Melanie also knew I loved music and collected records. She called me one day and invited over to the old Pharmacy her dad owned on 73rd Avenue. She was getting rid of things and asked me if I'd like to look through all of the old 78 records, that were in stacks, in different areas of the front floor. I came over and before I knew it..not only was I going through the records, but also moving boxes, and cleaning stuff, and taking stuff out to the dumpster. I came home that day covered in soot and dust, and still, to this day, have a box of the old 78s, which I treasure, which she gave me. She'd always ask me, "You still got my dad's 78s" when I would see or talk to her. She loved that they were not thrown away, but now safe and appreciated and in my collection. I really miss how kind and quirky and funny she was. Always had a shoulder for me, and was always one who understood my point of view on some things, even though we didn't always agree. This is really what true friends are about. I'm thankful to have known her for over 20 years!! One last thing, I did get a chance to meet Aunt Clyde, when I visited 73rd Avenue that day. She was only about 92 or 93 at the time, but Mel would always give me updates starting with something like, "Well, she just turned 97 and she's still driving!" So funny!! Since Melanie has passed, I find myself now, like I'm sure many are doing, spending time looking at all of the things she's given me. Even here by my computer at home, I have a little toy which is from some kiddie show, where the character is sitting in a rocket ship. Astro Boy or something. I remember her giving it to me, and her saying, "Even at your age, you need some toys to play with." (I was probably in my mid-40s, and just turned 60 this last year!) And yes, I do sometimes roll it around and play with it and will continue to do so in the future, in her honor! We all know she was "one of a kind", and that's the least I can do for her!! Read less This is Pete....I want to add, after Melanie retired,... Read more I would sometimes hire her for 10-15 hours a week to help with projects at the Division of Research, where I sometimes needed a little extra help. She just wanted to get out of the house and do something, and make a few bucks for fun. She always had her way of doing things. When I'd tell her, "When you make a note on any of the forms use a Post-It and use a ball point pen and write clearly, so I can read it..." I told her this many times, but she seemed to go out of her way to use a Pink or Blue Highlighting Felt Pen to write these notes, I'm guessing, just to "mess" with me!! Most of the time I couldn't read what she wrote. I'd have to ask her "What does this note say Mel?", to which she'd reply with something like, "Can't read it? Well, next time I'll write it in Greek for you so you'll be able to read it!" We'd always have a good laugh. Melanie also knew I loved music and collected records. She called me one day and invited over to the old Pharmacy her dad owned on 73rd Avenue. She was getting rid of things and asked me if I'd like to look through all of the old 78 records, that were in stacks, in different areas of the front floor. I came over and before I knew it..not only was I going through the records, but also moving boxes, and cleaning stuff, and taking stuff out to the dumpster. I came home that day covered in soot and dust, and still, to this day, have a box of the old 78s, which I treasure, which she gave me. She'd always ask me, "You still got my dad's 78s" when I would see or talk to her. She loved that they were not thrown away, but now safe and appreciated and in my collection. I really miss how kind and quirky and funny she was. Always had a shoulder for me, and was always one who understood my point of view on some things, even though we didn't always agree. This is really what true friends are about. I'm thankful to have known her for over 20 years!! One last thing, I did get a chance to meet Aunt Clyde, when I visited 73rd Avenue that day. She was only about 92 or 93 at the time, but Mel would always give me updates starting with something like, "Well, she just turned 97 and she's still driving!" So funny!! Since Melanie has passed, I find myself now, like I'm sure many are doing, spending time looking at all of the things she's given me. Even here by my computer at home, I have a little toy which is from some kiddie show, where the character is sitting in a rocket ship. Astro Boy or something. I remember her giving it to me, and her saying, "Even at your age, you need some toys to play with." (I was probably in my mid-40s, and just turned 60 this last year!) And yes, I do sometimes roll it around and play with it and will continue to do so in the future, in her honor! We all know she was "one of a kind", and that's the least I can do for her!! Read less

Irene Kane

Thanks Pete for the sweet memories. See you soon. Thanks Pete for the sweet memories. See you soon. Thanks Pete for the sweet memories. See you soon.

Emily Sullivan

Oakland, CA, USA

Hands-down, my favorite memory was our tradition of decorating our Christmas tree together. Every year we lived in our house in Oakland, which was getting on 20 years, Melanie helped us decorate the tree. She helped through when the kids were too little to help, to when they were super cute, and she would bring them ornaments with their names on it to put up, to when they didn’t want to help anymore, lol. We even decorated a tree outside during lockdown in December 2020. We also celebrated almost every Valentine’s Day with her, often with our neighbor Archana as well. Melanie was so much fun and always brought something joyfully wacky to share, USUALLY valentine themed. I can’t imagine the holidays would’ve been very fun for Melanie in 2022, had she lived to see them. She missed Halloween which I know she enjoyed at our house and also Nora’s. A part of me is glad, for her sake, that she didn’t have to live through the holiday season locked away at home.

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Irene Kane

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Linda Patch

Melanie could be very spontaneous - one day at DOR, she said, I think I’m going to buy a loft - will you come with me?” I drove w/her to talk w/the developer. The last unit left was the model unit - at one point, the developer took a call and we sat there, his back turned to us while on his call. There was a Post-It pad & Sharpie in the desktop - I wrote what I thought what Melanie should offer, which was a LOT lower than the asking price. The developer ended his call, turned back around, Melanie made the offer that I suggested, he agreed & she bought her Tower Loft. As we got in the car, TO MY SURPRISE, she said, “can you live there for a few years, I’m not ready to move in”. Her mom was in the last few years of her life and Melanie had to stay w/ her at the old family home over the pharmacy on East 73rd. 2-3 years later her mom passed away and Melanie moved into the loft, where she lived for the rest of her life.

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Emily Sullivan

Wow!!! We have always wondered about that. Thank you for sharing. And what a great story. ❤️☺️🙏 Wow!!! We have always wondered about that. Thank you for sharing. And what a great story. ❤️☺️🙏 Wow!!! We have always wondered about that. Thank ... Read more

Emily Sullivan

Do you go by “Jo”? Do you go by “Jo”? Do you go by “Jo”?

Linda Patch

Linda (Paroubeck) Patch Linda (Paroubeck) Patch Linda (Paroubeck) Patch

Linda Patch

My daughter goes by “Jo” (chosen name), I’ve always been called Linda My daughter goes by “Jo” (chosen name), I’ve always been called Linda My daughter goes by “Jo” (chosen name), I’ve always... Read more

Nuria Valero

Alameda, CA, USA

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Emily Sullivan

Irene Kane

Nuria Valero

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Nuria Valero

“Melanie sent this photo to me (Judy Vasos) and after her burial
yesterday I love seeing her so relaxed ... Read more “Melanie sent this photo to me (Judy Vasos) and after her burial
yesterday I love seeing her so relaxed and peaceful at Xmas ... Read more “Melanie sent this photo to me (Judy Vasos) and after... Read more

Irene Kane

Dreaming together. Dreaming together. Dreaming together.

Emily Sullivan

2021, Napa, CA, USA

Saying “Yes” to Napa at nearly 81 years old ❤️

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Irene Kane

Nuria Valero

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Irene Kane

Oh, the "yes" trip. Looks very peaceful. Oh, the "yes" trip. Looks very peaceful. Oh, the "yes" trip. Looks very peaceful.

judy vasos

Enjoyed the story you told at the Mass about Melanie joining you in Napa. Said a lot about dear Melanie. ... Read more Enjoyed the story you told at the Mass about Melanie joining you in Napa. Said a lot about dear Melanie. Judy Vasos
Melanie. ... Read more Enjoyed the story you told at the Mass about Melanie... Read more

Suzanne Johnson

2018, Oakland, CA, USA

Day Trip to Visit Claire — with Cousin Claire and Melanie

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Emily Sullivan

Irene Kane

Nuria Valero

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Judy Velardi

This is Melanie visiting her first cousin, Claire White Violich Rotko, who was 105 years old. This is Melanie visiting her first cousin, Claire White Violich Rotko, who was 105 years old. This is Melanie visiting her first cousin, Claire White... Read more

Emily Sullivan

Love that you have one with “Aunt” Claire. Melanie visited and helped Claire a lot. Love that you have one with “Aunt” Claire. Melanie visited and helped Claire a lot. Love that you have one with “Aunt” Claire. Melanie... Read more

judy vasos

I remember Melanie's stories about her visit to Claire. Good to see them both on this site.
Judy vasos I remember Melanie's stories about her visit to Claire. Good to see them both on this site.
Judy vasos I remember Melanie's stories about her visit to Claire.... Read more

Suzanne Johnson

2018, Stockton, CA, USA

Visiting Cousins — with Melanie, Christpher, Jacob

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Emily Sullivan

Irene Kane

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Suzanne Johnson

2018, Stockton, CA, USA

Visiting Cousins — with Julie, Jacob, Melanie, Suzanne

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Emily Sullivan

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Judy Velardi

Great photo of our cousins. Great photo of our cousins. Great photo of our cousins.

Suzanne Johnson

2018, Stockton, CA, USA

Visiting Cousins, Jan 2018 — with Chris, Jacob, Julie, Melanie

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Emily Sullivan

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Irene Kane

We shared many events together during our Kaiser days at DOR and in retirement. Miss you Mel. Thanks for adopting me into the Virgo Group and giving me a 9/1 birthday to "fit in."

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Irene Kane

2010, San Francisco, CA

Maybe dinner at the Farallons

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Emily Sullivan

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Irene Kane

Dorothy, Melanie, Irene, Margaret, Andrea Dorothy, Melanie, Irene, Margaret, Andrea Dorothy, Melanie, Irene, Margaret, Andrea

Irene Kane

2013, Oakland, CA, USA

Margaret's retirement at her house

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Emily Sullivan

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Irene Kane

Margaret, Melania, Paula, Andrea Margaret, Melania, Paula, Andrea Margaret, Melania, Paula, Andrea

Irene Kane

2011, Oakland, CA, USA

Mel brought cupcakes to Irene's Ethiopian birthday lunch on Telegraph

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Emily Sullivan

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Irene Kane

We had a cupcake thing going for awhile. I still have a paper cupcake jewelry holder for my earrings from... Read more We had a cupcake thing going for awhile. I still have a paper cupcake jewelry holder for my earrings from Melanie. We had a cupcake thing going for awhile. I still have... Read more

Irene Kane

Margaret, Melanie, Judy, Irene, Alice Margaret, Melanie, Judy, Irene, Alice Margaret, Melanie, Judy, Irene, Alice

Irene Kane

2014, Oakland, CA, USA

Drug/Alcohol Team

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Emily Sullivan

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Irene Kane

Lynda, Melanie and ?? not sure Lynda, Melanie and ?? not sure Lynda, Melanie and ?? not sure

Irene Kane

2006, Oakland, CA DOR event

Melanie and work friends from DOR

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Emily Sullivan

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Irene Kane

Back in the day when we had very nice lunches and dinners with the Division of Research team and we wore ... Read more Back in the day when we had very nice lunches and dinners with the Division of Research team and we wore our finery. There's Mel... Read more Back in the day when we had very nice lunches and dinners... Read more