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Mandy's obituary

So many folks have been asking for an obit, so even though if we asked Mandy if she wanted one, we all know she’d throw out some great line like: “naw, scrap it”... that was her: raw, always humble, self effacing, yet jovial, fun, light hearted, quick with a joke or to light up HER smoke (credit Billy Joel there… ;-)...

Mandy Loutrel is what the kids today call a “savage”. Tough, often purposeful, yet sometimes whimsical. She was as tough as they come. Forged in Orange, NJ by Helen and Cy in the blizzardy winter of 1939, we won’t bore you with the many of the early details because I know this update is primarily for those interested in 2004-2025… ;-)... yet for those who don’t know the background…

Mandy moved to Mystic with Helen, Cy, and brother Rusty at a young age. She reveled in her schoolwork, peers, and teachers at Mystic Academy and to the end credited them for creating an academic focus in her life.

She claimed to have been a decent young athlete, and because I never really heard her lie or even exaggerate much, maybe this is true. She told me she was a decent tennis player and sailor.

In 1957 she finished WMI in New London and got accepted to 2 colleges: Smith and Dean Junior College, which will close in the next 5 years, I’ll wager…

Smith was one of the great loves of her life. She loved and admired institutions equally with people. I always found that so honorable and it inspired me to still do the same today. Living in Parsons House, they called her the Grunion, Mandy sang and danced and acted a little while majoring in History.

Upon graduation in 1961, Mandy and Cindy Powell (nee Maughn) went to Europe and I think Mandy stayed and lived in Geneva for a while, then she barreled back to the states and of course had one destination… Gotham…

Of course, Mandy chose New York for it’s excellence, panache, and good cheer. She settled in with Helga, Renata, and Judy Inglis maybe? (anyone please feel to correct me, I am an old doddering fool and can’t always remember Mandy’s grand stories…) at the 301 Club, 301 E. 62nd Street in the only city that matters…

The love of Mandy’s life Hamish McDougal was killed in a car wreck in 1964 and we will get to the follow up on that later…

Mandy was one of the first professional women hired by Audits & Surveys, New York Life, and Booz, Allen and Hamilton. It was at Booz that Mandy met Lynne Groves who would eventually serve as Mary Helen’s godmother.

Mandy met Jose Barrera when Maughn invited her beau (a Colombian fellow) and Jose to brunch at 301. Mandy was taken and she and Jose were married in Mystic in1968. First came the sweet Mary Helen 1970, and then the HELLION Joshua in ‘72.

I will sprinkle in some of Mandy’s great lines here and there… When I asked her how difficult Mary and I were as kids she said: “parenting you two was the greatest pleasure of my life”...

When I asked her why she married Jose, she said: “he was the most charming man I’d ever been around. I loved him so much it made me physically ill sometimes not to be around him. I loved his artistic mentality”...

After 20 years in NY, Mandy moved Mary and Josh to Mystic, CT because she inherited her mom’s house on Mason’s Island.

There she went to work as a low level financial analyst at Electric Boat helping them build nuclear subs for the Navy…

Mary to Smith, Josh to Hamilton and Mandy to Norwich, CT until March 17, 2004 when Josh received a phone call. This was unusual because it was almost ALWAYS Josh who called Mandy and at this point they probably only spoke on the phone bimonthly…

“Josh: I want you to tell me I am insane. I had a vision recently of Hamish McDougal and wrote a letter to his old address in Scotland. His brother Duncan answered the letter and wants me to come for a visit. I am going to retire and spend my time traveling the globe. Can I live with you in Boston between trips?”

Before she even finished, I said I would be delighted and thrilled… what I have only come to realize in the last few weeks (largely because I am a blockheaded jerkoff sometimes) is that Mandy loved, honored, and trusted me so completely that she wanted to spend her retirement around me… what a honor…

So Mandy spent from 2004-2019 going for 3, 6, and 9 month junkets, always solo living in a home she would rent from a local usually, to…

Scotland 3 times

Ireland 1

Copenhagen 1

Malta 3

France 4

Italy 3

Mexico 4

Sweden 1

Turkey 1

Connecticut for John Binti RB Tod Lisa

NC for Terry Daphne

And there were MANY MANY others. And that’s the best part, she never wrote much down, it was all in her mind tho, that powerful mind…

She volunteered at the Boston Public Library doing used book fairs and her beloved Boston Symphony Orchestra arranging flowers and showing young kids musical instruments…

In 2019, Mandy began to slow and I think the Pandemic did a real number on her…

This past Sunday night she died in her sleep, what a person. I am so proud to have known her and so happy to have been able to share her with you all, so let’s all lift a glass to Mary Amanda Loutrel, the round lady with the sparkling eyes and whimsical laugh… what a person, what a warrior, what a friend… salut, Mandy, rest well…

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Mary Amanda "Mandy" Loutrel