Always pushing me to do better

Always pushing me to do better

Josh was like a mentor/big brother to me he would always try to speak to me and give me pointers on doing better in life. I will never forget about that. He didn't want me to have to go what he went through if life.

My heart is forever yours

He had a way of making me smile when I didn't feel like it

I loved this man the good with the bad

Gosh baby where do i begin.Its sad to believe. That one day you will share your last moment with someone you love!! And you wont even know it. You wont realize that that day will be your last chance to say all the things you wanted to say!!! Time passes , but not one day goes by that your not in my heart. The day you died was not just a date on a calendar, it was the day that my very existence changed forever. The hardest goodbyes are the ones you don't see coming. The ones you dont plan. Or could ever imagine happening. Like one day we are both together, and little did we both know it would be our last day spent . There is nothing sadder than that!! I looked at a picture of you today, i wept, i poured , i rained. Not the tears of sadness. The tears of loss. Heavy tears, permanent tears. The kind that settle into your skin and make their home inside your bones. Tears of time ran out, tears of time gone still. It is not because you are gone. I wear you in my eyes , i hear you in my words. I taste you in my dreams. A sentiment. A memory. A yesterday just out of reach. No new lines will write their story upon your face. No storms will lend their grey to your hair. The sun wont dance in your smile. The moon wont play in your eyes. You will forever be our last embrace. I miss you all the time. But its not the pain of something lost. Its the weight of knowledge gained. A hard earned wisdom. A lesson i dont wish to learn. A book well read, a book well written. The kind you close when you are finished and hold close to your heart. A story out of print ,a story out of time, a story that will always live, in the pages of my mind!! I know the rules of reality would need to be broken for you to return, and yet I hope, i so foolishly hope. I miss you in ways i didn't know existed, you are a mental and physical ache, a longing woven deep into my dna, and i dont know how to live like this. Im still grieving even when i dont want to, even when i try not to, and i know that i will for the rest of my life. I USE TO BE YOUR ANGEL, AND NOW YOU ARE MINE!!

Just got home

Just got home — with joshua culver