Sending prayers to the family during this difficult time.May. God lift your mother up in his loving arms

I have a ton of stories that play back through my head. Ones that were beautiful and ones that were hard. Idk which to say. All I can say is my heart is full of so much pain, guilt and heartache. I thought we had more time together. The guilt of not being able to hold your hand and tell you how much I truly loved you and how grateful I was to have you in my life has been eating me alive. Worrying about everyday life and the stress of the day to day of taking care of you made me complacent with my feelings. I wish I told you every single time how you meant to me. Not a day will go by that I won't wish I could rewind time. I love you grandma and thank you for everything. 

Thinking back in my childhood I will always remember how smart and artistic she was. She could take a blank canvas and make it absolutely beautiful. She taught her self how to macrame, knit and crochet. She was just so smart. Anything she put her mind to she could do it. She came over here and learned English herself. She didn't even have an accent she did so well. 

She had a hard life, but when I needed her  the most she was always there for me. My heart is very heavy. I loved her and will miss her so much. What gives me comfort is knowing she believed in God and loved God. I just wish I could have been there by her side  when she passed to comfort her amd tell her how very much I love her.