IN MEMORY OF EMILY ANN JENSVOLD (1/6/1922 to 7/14/2021)

I feel truly blessed to have had Ann Jensvold as my mother, and to have had ten more years with her after our father died.

Growing up, our parents guided us mostly by example – not by lecturing us, or setting hard or arbitrary rules. Mom believed children were children, not just small adults. Consequently, she gave us leeway to play, and grow, and be cranky at times (only not for too long); to mature at our own pace; and to decide many things for ourselves.

For example, in fall 1966 before moving to California, I desperately wanted a big, blue, thick, fuzzy winter coat. Mom took me to the store, and said “We can get it, but you won’t be able to use it in California and it will be your only Christmas present. Are you SURE you want it?” Reluctantly, I agreed – and eventually, I got a much better present – a banana seat bicycle with the promise of a trip to Disneyland as soon as I learned to ride it.

In fact, we were not only ALLOWED to make our own decisions, we were EXPECTED to. If we wanted an opinion from either mom or dad, we were generally out of luck.

I’m sometimes amazed at what we were allowed to do as kids; but we wanted to please our parents, so we mostly behaved. Mom could be very clever at times. She once told us that it was not important who STARTED a fight; what mattered was who ENDED it. From then on, we competed to stop fights – which made fighting practically impossible.

For me, I adopted their stoic optimism (or calm, happiness) which has helped me to weather the inevitable ups & downs of life; to bend with the winds; and to enjoy the ride. It prepared me to work hard and seek success without the need to be Number One in the thing I was pursuing.

Mom provided an example of helping others and serving people in ways that often went unrecognized.

- For instance, for many years (probably decades) she organized annual church fund raising events in both Orange and Lincoln (e.g. garage sales and Christmas Bazaars).

- Similarly, she was a Girl Scout volunteer long before she had children and long after all four of us completed Senior scouts (high school level). In addition to serving as a troop leader while we were active scouts, she worked for decades afterward coordinating our Council’s camp equipment lending program.

Our parents also modeled how to age well. Following my dad’s retirement they used Elder Hostel to see the wider world. Then, in 2002, as they got older and thought they should live closer to their children, they moved to Sun City. I was surprised by their choice because it seemed out of character – especially for dad. But the wisdom of their move became clear over time as I realized that being surrounded by active, healthy people slightly younger than them would help to keep THEM active and healthy too.

THANK YOU for being part of the fabric that made my parents’ lives richer.

Without you I don’t think mom would have lived nearly as long.

With love and gratitude to all of you,

Betsy Ann Jensvold