Liz and Felipe’s wedding

A couple of years ago, I was catching up with a friend over video chat. We started reminiscing about our time living in Portland, and eventually Emily Glover came up. We were talking about how fun and easy her company always was. We even laughed about how she navigated her social circles—my friend and I always saw ourselves as outsiders (we both came up through the ’80s hardcore punk scene), yet Emily welcomed us completely. She was open, warm, and accepting in a way that felt rare.

While we were talking about her, I looked her up online—just out of curiosity—and discovered, to my shock, that she had passed away a couple of years earlier. I had no idea. I left Portland in 2016 and moved overseas, and somehow the news never reached me. It was a deeply sad thing to learn, especially about someone who should have had so much more life ahead of her.

Emily and I spent a lot of time together cooking and sharing meals. We even hosted a few dinner parties. Those are such beautiful memories.

I miss her dearly.

After Emily, the clinic we worked at was never the same. 3 years later and I’m working in a new office with people that remind me so much of her. My manager had a baby today and announced her name to the team, “Meet Emily” she said. I will never not think of you when I hear your name. <3

I worked with Emily at women’s health for the Oregon clinic. She was the kindest and most loving person I had dealt with in the field. Once, I had a patient’s insurance company call and try to disparage me for something I did not do and Emily had my back the entire way thru. Even with the passing years, I miss her to this day. I remember how her positivity and love of life could turn even my pouty little outlook around. I am happy to have had the honor to know you. 

Bridget

No matter how different people were around, she always treated everyone with the kindest heart and looked after people no matter what.  They could have done something that negatively affected her and she would just brush it off and move on. We miss you, Em!

I remember when I needed a last minute Halloween costume for a party. Emily loaned me a handmade mermaid tail that she had crafted herself. I was so amazed and impressed that she had made the whole thing and had offered it to me, even though she barely knew me at the time. I will always remember her generosity and creativity. 

Somewhat early on in our dating, Emily and I went camping in the Gorge. It was a last minute thing so we didn't have reservations anywhere and we needed somewhere close. Quick note, Emily was the queen of camping meals and a time camping before, she made calzones for us that we made in the fire. They came out perfect and to this day one of the best camping meals I've ever had. So the plan this time was to do the same thing. We of course got a late start and headed out to the Gorge. It started getting dark but we finally found a campsite all to our selves right on the water. The reason we had it all to ourselves is because of the constant 20mph winds coming off the water. We knew we couldn't make a fire but we also only had the calzones to eat so we made a small fire in the campsite BBQ grill which at least had sides to block the wind, or so we thought. We got the fire going and tossed on the calzones. The wind basically created a super heated blast furnace in the grill with flames shooting everywhere. We rotated the calzones as best we could but when we finally ate they were charred on the outside and totally raw on the inside. We ate what we could, accepted out defeat and went to bed. We awoke about 30 minutes later, and every hour after that to the sound of the train rumbling and blowing it's horn. 

At the time we considered it a failed camping trip but as time passed we would always laugh and joke about it. It will always be one of my most memorable and cherished camping trips with Emily.

Em,

This was the last text I sent you one year ago today. Maybe that’s why I felt so compelled to write today.  

“Just realized I missed your birthday. Hope you had a great day!!!! ❤️❤️ Happy Birthday”!!

And I guess part of me waited to write because I didn’t want you to think we are all just thinking of you on your birthday. Because I know anyone reading this, anyone who told a story or has said kind words, and anyone who knew you, thinks of you often.

Your birthday always kind of marked the start of spring. Sometimes, like last Saturday, friends got to sit outside and enjoy the sun while we toasted another year that passed. This year, despite the smiles on our faces, I knew how much we all still hurt and missed your giant smile and contagious energy. Many of us still trying to make sense of what happened and taking comfort in being together.

And now for a story. As everyone knows, Emily loved to craft. So it was by no accident that when I decided everyone attending my wedding needed a feather fascinator, I called in the forces led by Emily. I’ll never forget opening my door to Emily holding 5 glue guns. (I mean who doesn’t own 5 different glue guns in various sizes?) In a matter of a few hours, with a well organized assembly line, feathers were everywhere and fascinators were done. I think I found feathers for months after that. Haha.

True friends show up. That was Emily. She was always determined, passionate, a true creator. Even on the small (but actually big) stuff like helping a friend achieve their wedding accessory goals.

I miss and love you every day friend! 

As I head to sleep tonight I look forward to looking up at the ceiling and seeing the rabbit, the crocodile, the man in the hat, and all the other creatures and characters that Emily and I would point out in the patterns on the ceiling. Emily of course would always see more than I could. She would often have to spend minutes pointing and drawing out the new things she saw with her fingers until I would finally see it! But from then on it was always there. 

She always saw everything and everyone.

Emily always had the most contagious smile and laugh. She would light up any room that she was in so effortlessly. I was really close to her in high school while on the yearbook staff together. We always had the best time! Plus her birthday was the day after mine so we shared that while in school. I just turned 40 and I know she truly would have embraced her 40’s with open arms and a big ol smile ❤️

Today is hitting even harder than I anticipated. The grief that is always there is rising to the surface, boiling over again.

There are so many memories of you. So much that reminds me of your time here. Which story could I share that sums it all up? How can I even begin? I can’t. Nothing would come close to explaining your heart, your energy, your spirit. Only those of us who were lucky enough to to know you understand what I mean.

But there is one thing I can think of. Something that’s been with me since you left.

I don’t know where you are now, but I know you came to visit. Just one time. A halo of you came through, glowing in the dimness. I felt your presence hovering right there. An aura of you, of your light, sat with me for the briefest of moments. I knew it was you. And as quickly as you arrived, you left again.

In a flash I understood what you were trying to convey. You were saying hello, and goodbye, at the same time. You were giving me a smile and a wave, a wink and a nod. You were telling me that you knew you were gone, that you knew you couldn’t change it, and that you were okay.

All time stopped. It took my breath away. It was over so quickly.

It was then I began to realise, as hard as it is to do, that I had to find a way to stop worrying about you. Because if I, or anyone else, continue to worry, then you would never be able to truly rest. And you of all people, sweet Emily, deserve to rest.

This is the story I want to share. To explain your generosity. Because even after you were gone, you were still looking out. You were still being a friend. Your incredibly kind, giving, loving heart still came through to visit. You were still being you.

To know you was to love you. And to love you is now to grieve you. Sadly they are now one in the same. I’m forever grateful for the memories, the stories, the light you shined while here, and from beyond. You are always with me Em. I love you my friend. 

Emily, I’ll never forget our craft nights! We’re we would attempt to be crafty but usually sit, share stories, most likely enjoying wine and laugh. Another good one that just popped into mind, we all decided to go sailing on Brian’s boat to camp on government island one night and of all things you brought ice cream on a boat. By the time we got around to eating it, it was ice cream soup. 

I’ll never forget the day I heard you passed, I was on a hike in Glacier National park. I could hear you up there watching down on us. Keep shinning from above. 

After buying my first house with my new boyfriend (now husband) I shared with Emily how  clueless I was on how to take care of a house - especially the yard.  A few days later, Emily showed up to work and told me she had a bunch of starts from her mom Becky.  It was a surprise to all of a sudden be given a bunch of plants I had no clue about but it was evident that Em had chatted with her mom about this friend of hers with a new garden and that she might need a little help.

I was gifted raspberry starts (I’m pretty sure they are still thriving at the house we sold 6 years ago….) and sedum and other beauties I’m forgetting at the moment.  I was grateful but, I didn’t even know where to start with the starts, so Emily and our dear friend Sam came over and helped me understand what to do.  First we needed a place for these new plants, so we landed on a small patch of soil next to the entrance of the house.  

That day we sat on the ground and got our hands dirty, laughing, problem solving, drinking beers (probably) and enjoying the process.  In the end we created a beautiful, green, vibrant corner of the property.  We all felt happy, satisfied and declared this small but impactful achievement needed a name - so we called it  The Love Glove Garden.  The beauty in that memory and generosity from the  Glovers live with me always.  

When I’m in my garden in a different house in Bothell, WA, I think of Emily constantly - she was there at the start of my gardening journey and will continue to be.  I bought a beautiful rose today in honor of her on her birthday  - it’s bright pink, needs lots of sun, has a sweet fragrance and is called “Sitting Pretty”.  

Emily, you will always be Sitting Pretty with me in my garden, I miss you terribly and thank you for passing on your love of gardening and allowing me to build on that Love Glove Garden each place I have lived.  

Happy Birthday beautiful friend! I think of you so often. When I picture you, I think of Seattle for Bao and Chris’s wedding- the gorgeous house we stayed in with that amazing rain room! We were laying in the hammock hoping for rain and then it poured. And dancing together in Big Canoe at Matt and Sarah’s wedding. So grateful to have been able to celebrate so many wonderful things with you, including your own gorgeous wedding. We sat with your mom and hole punched leaves for biodegradable confetti- your thoughtfulness for nature left such a mark on me. 

Happy birthday, Emily.  I am not generally at ease around many people. It is rare for me to meet people who's energy feels like yours: completely safe, warm and open. When I think of you, the first thing that comes to mind is your smile and the way you always felt like someone who was genuinely present, loving and attentive to those around you.  I loved your curiosity, your care, your love of camping and adventures,  your creativity, your snack selection (and costco membership), your love of beauty, animals and of course, Brett, Winnie and Praline. The energy that you brought on our camping trips was always something I looked forward to. I can still picture the various ways you would look at Brett and I loved this one face you would make which I can't describe but always made me laugh. It was a playful questioning face and I think playfulness is such a wonderful energy to embrace. I remember being struck once while hiking with you and Brett in a group at salmon river  by a strong sense that you and Brett were meant to be in each other's lives. I can't describe it well, but it was a feeling I got in my chest. I remember looking up at you two hiking, Brett with his mushroom basket, and feeling so happy that you two had found each other.  I imagined and sensed you both in the future in that instant also. That moment on that trail and that image of you two always stuck with me for whatever reason. It's one of my favorite trails and I'm so glad we got to go together.  You always asked me about work and I could tell when we spoke that your care for others and community was sincere and also a driving force in the way you lived your life. Thank you for donating all of the brightly colored hand sewn masks you made during the beginning of COVID, which I kept in my top drawer  at work and handed out to people at the shelter. You and I were born months apart in the same year at the same hospital, though I can't remember if we ever talked about this. I didn't know you played volleyball until after the accident and I wish I had known because I would have loved to pepper at the campsite with you if you would have also liked that. When I watched your memorial at home, I lit some nice candles and wore a bright magenta kaftan. I picked it because I know you would have liked the vibrant color and would also have looked really beautiful in it.   I loved the story Brett shared of the scent he kept smelling in your home after the accident that turned out to be a plant that had bloomed for the first time.  I hope you can leave more things like this for him and for anyone else who is open to receive them. I cannot begin to imagine how many lives you touched and have given meaning and joy to. I also know the intensity with which you are missed and grieved is significant and I am sending love today to everyone who is missing you and mourning the loss of you.   I will never forget your smile and your warm energy and am grateful that I knew you. I was just telling a friend ,who also turns 40 this year, that everyone who is anyone turns 40 this year, so it comes as no surprise that this would be your 40th also. -Keri