Emily’s smile brightened our campus everyday!

The sweet things I remember about Emily: I first met Emily as a tiny little girl in our church Sunday School for children.  She is my daughters age and I was a teacher.  The two of them sat together and giggled as their little feet swung from their chairs.  Emily was shy and quiet but had a little spark that would come out every once in awhile. She was a beautiful child, funny and well behaved. I noticed right away her kindness toward others.

As time went on, we enjoyed birthday parties at the Crowder home and Emily was always invited to Gretchen's parties as well. Emily was consistently gracious, loved to giggle and have fun but most of all made sure everyone was included in the fun. She was a delight to be around.

As time went on and the girls grew they remained friends but did not attend the same school so physical distance made it more difficult to stay in touch as often but social media and summers at Girls Camp kept them connected. Friendships were renewed as if they had never been apart and the giggles started again - Especially the Mama bird, baby bird skit!

True to Emily's character, as they were both going off to college, she wanted to walk the Stanford "dish" with Gretchen. They had a good time catching up, talking about boys and their anticipation of this big step away from home and into independence.  Gretchen was feeling somewhat anxious about the thought of being so far away and within days, dedicated and intuitive Emily arrived with a package of beautiful soft white towels, monogrammed with Gretchen's initials. This was such a thoughtful gesture and those towels were used all through college and now are the towels in Gretchen's guest bathroom. They are still a beautiful white with a bright red monogram. Last time I visited Gretchen I sent a picture of the towels to Alisyn and told her that Emily's kindness will never be forgotten. 

I imagine Emily in her heavenly home dressed in white; a teacher of children and the beautiful person holding the white towel for the tears of joy as those she loves are reunited unburdened, unworried and free from life's trials.

You have a very special place in my heart and always will Emily.  You live in the hearts of the legions of people that you loved and loved you, those you taught, those you showed kindness toward and those you helped along the way.

I love you Emily.

Love,

Betsy 

I can’t imagine how hard things have been since Emily’s passing. Your family has been in my prayers, and I’m wishing you strength and peace—especially now over the holidays.

I thought you might enjoy a memory that makes me smile: Back when I was spending a lot of time in Utah, Emily and I often grabbed dinner. Once at Communal on a cold night in Provo, she gave me an detailed French lesson on the menu’s etymology, shifted effortlessly into the nuances of updated federal Tax Code, then told me the story of how Run DMC helped Adidas take off in the States.

Her curiosity, intelligence, and humor were always front and center. Another time, she spent half an hour telling me everything she loved about each of her family members, then asked me all about mine. It was clear to me how much she cared about what’s true and right, and what things in life truly matter.

Here’s a quick video clip I found from one of our many karaoke nights—she was right where she belonged: center stage, singing poignant words: “live your life with arms wide open”.

I first met Emily in 2009 during our freshman year at Menlo. Emily and I had several classes together and became fast friends. Every new school year, she would come back from her summer trips to Lake Powell with tons of fun stories and an amazing tan that made her eyes look so blue. I have fond memories of many sleepovers in her family's guest room (which we referred to as "the chill zone" back then), walking the dish, riding around town in her Volvo, and playing with Oakley as a puppy. 

For a period of time in high school, we both thought that we might want to become doctors, and so our senior year we jumped at the opportunity to shadow a Menlo dad who was a neurosurgeon at a hospital in Fremont. We woke up early to drive there together, but on our way there, just as we drove onto the Dumbarton bridge in Emily's car, we ran over something in the middle of the road. We were confused and didn't see anything, but a few seconds later, we were hit with a horrible smell. We quickly realized that we had hit a skunk that had apparently made its way onto the bridge, and there was absolutely nothing we could do. We were screaming and laughing and trying not to suffocate or crash. Emily somehow managed to get us there safely and we fortunately did not smell as bad as the outside of her car did. It was truly an unforgettable day, and we even got the opportunity to scrub in and watch a spinal surgery together. 

After college, I was lucky enough to overlap with Emily in NYC and rekindle our friendship. She already lived in the city when I moved in 2019, and having a friend there was so comforting. There was never once a dull moment with Emily - each time I saw her, she had so many life updates and new things going on, whether she was taking up a new hobby like sewing, debuting a new hairstyle, or pivoting careers and landing her dream job. Her life was so spontaneous and full of action. She was so excited when she secured an amazing apartment on one of the most coveted streets in the West Village for a great deal during Covid, and she put so much care and thought into decorating it to maximize space and make it her home. I know Emily's mental illness never left and she struggled with dark times because of it, but despite these challenges, she built a very full and exciting life for herself in NYC, and I am so proud of her for that. 

It breaks my heart to think about the pain that Emily was in. She did not deserve the mental health card she was dealt, but I find comfort in knowing that she had such a supportive and loving family to lean on. One recent memory stands out that really attests to this from when I spent Emily's birthday with her a few years ago in NYC. Almost everything was shut down because of covid, so her mom planned a zoom party during which everyone went around and said what they loved most about Emily. Dave read her the most thoughtful and sweet poem that he had written for her. I was literally holding back tears at the time thinking how lucky she was to have such a tight-knit and loving family.

Dave, Alisyn, Matt, Sam and Eliza (and new spouses and babies who I have not met but have heard lots about from Emily) - Emily loved you so much and was extremely grateful for you. Thank you for so bravely sharing your words and memories of Emily at her memorial, and for bringing an amazing person like Emily into the world. I feel lucky to have so many special memories to look back on with her.  

Rest in peace Emily - you are very loved and missed.