Happy (belated) heavenly birthday, Elizabeth😇 You were on my mind yesterday especially. Thank you for the light you shared with us. Miss you, Friend💗

Hey babe,  people down here still miss you. I sure do, bigly. Thinking of you often and especially today.  Love, Mark

I did a show with Elizabeth in New York in 2012 and so loved working with her. The show (Rx) was well received and Elizabeth was brilliant in it. She was smart, funny and passionate. I only just now learned that we lost her and I’m deeply saddened. If this reaches anyone else who was touched by her I send my love and condolences.   

On The Death Of The Beloved

— John O’Donohue

Though we need to weep your loss,

You dwell in that safe place in our hearts,


Where no storm or night or pain can reach you.

Your love was like the dawn


Brightening over our lives


Awakening beneath the dark


A further adventure of colour.

The sound of your voice


Found for us


A new music


That brightened everything.

Whatever you enfolded in your gaze


Quickened in the joy of its being;


You placed smiles like flowers


On the altar of the heart.


Your mind always sparkled


With wonder at things.

Though your days here were brief,


Your spirit was live, awake, complete.

We look towards each other no longer


From the old distance of our names;


Now you dwell inside the rhythm of breath,


As close to us as we are to ourselves.

Though we cannot see you with outward eyes,


We know our soul’s gaze is upon your face,


Smiling back at us from within everything


To which we bring our best refinement.

Let us not look for you only in memory,


Where we would grow lonely without you.


You would want us to find you in presence,


Beside us when beauty brightens,


When kindness glows


And music echoes eternal tones.

When orchids brighten the earth,


Darkest winter has turned to spring;


May this dark grief flower with hope
In every heart that loves you.

May you continue to inspire us:

To enter each day with a generous heart.


To serve the call of courage and love


Until we see your beautiful face again


In that land where there is no more separation,


Where all tears will be wiped from our mind,


And where we will never lose you again.

I miss her every day and keep wishing that maybe somehow she has not left us. But reading over all these remembrances and wise words, I realize she will never leave us. That laugh, that gorgeous, gorgeous smile, her presence… Nobody made me laugh the way she made me laugh. I met her when she did RX, and from then on, we became friends. She even made me lunch down at her apartment in Brooklyn and made me this beautiful farro salad.

Later, when she started her FLOW business, I hired her to work with me. She was so focused and powerful in her intention to get me to Declutter my apartment. I started to call her, “Santa Crudele,” instead of my usual moniker for her, “Elisabetta,” as we bonded over all matters Italian and spoke Italian together. My whole chest aches with missing her, and as I mentioned before, in reading these loving tributes from all of you I am trying to turn the ache into joyfulness over knowing and loving her. Grateful for this space where we can share. Wishing everyone strength and enduring Elizabeth love. Namaste. 🙏🏽 

I went looking for something beautiful to post in honor of Elizabeth, who is eternally and imperishably beautiful. This was the first thing that came up. I think she'd like it. xoxo

I miss you Elizabeth 💗💗 So many things have come up that I’ve wanted to share with you since you’ve been gone. And when I remember  you I always, always think of your beautiful face lighting up as you shared your stories of people and places and things you found interesting.

Some of the longest and best conversations of my life were with you. You remain forever in my heart  and will be  forever missed😢

Thinking of you on your birthday, Elizabeth. Always in my thoughts.

Elizabeth was my daughter-in-law. Her Dad let everyone of us down, but that wasn't what made me stay connected to Elizabeth after our divorce. I loved her for herself. But I was young and careless- now that I'm turning eighty next year I wish with all my heart and soul I had realized how unhappy she was. I would have invited her to come and live with me- as I had for periods in the past. I feel so terrible that I didn't follow up. There aren't too many relationships where I feel that I could have helped, but in this instance I'm pretty sure I could have done something to ameliorate her situation.  I will never, ever forget her and I will always regret not being there when she needed me.  I'll always remember when Bill first introduced me to Elizabeth and Lisa. They were very young and sat so politely on a settee in my living room. I was taking their father away- and I had no idea that I was committing a crime. It's one of the few things in my life that I would give anything to do over again. It was inexcusable - and I will never, ever forgive myself... Lisa, I send love to you and wish you and your family much happiness and all good fortune...

Miss you,  dear Friend💗

Still think of you often and remember your booming laugh.

Thinking of her when I see beautiful things. Grateful for our connection. 💖

Yesterday was the one year anniversary of E’s death. For me - because I found out only 4 or 5 days after her death and only told all of you then - the anniversary of her passing will be all week for me.  So this week I’d love for all of us to talk about her best qualities.

Here are mine:

Her whole hearted laugh

Her fiery spirit

Her love of me, my husband Gregg, and my kids

Her a little bit crazy canine love

Her commitment to never missing any kind of milestone in her friends lives

Her talent

Her creativity

Her generosity 

Most of all I miss the best of times - the times we  could both tease each other, laugh together.  I knew her her whole life and she was younger (as she would make sure everyone knew!).  I don’t know what to call it, but she was integral to my whole identity - we didn’t have parents but we had each other and I’m feeling like a part of me is missing.

I met Elizabeth in Cleveland. We had been cast in Good People, and lo and behold we were to be playing best friends.  She was a powerhouse,  (even standing still.)  She came to my 'place' shortly after we had all settled in to our respective apartments.  She was telling me all about her journey to the Whole Foods store. An epic hilarious tale of wrong turns, long lines and not so great produce. I informed her that I had just purchased some supplies at the convenient store in the lobby.  She promptly opened my cupboards.... revealing... cup o' soups, wheat thins,  Ramen etc.  "NO!" she bellowed, "What are  you? 12?!" LOL. I was smitten.  Only 9 days later my mother passed away, very unexpectedly.  I will never forget the care and love and support she gave to me throughout the ordeal.  She became a sister to me.  Always loving with wit and intelligence .  During the last two months of her life,  we were talking about leaving our desert lives (Me Vegas, Her Sante Fe) and moving to LA together to start our final chapters as 'Golden Girls'.  I so wish we could have made that happen,  But as I wake in LA every morning.  I feel her.  There is a bird of Paradise in the back yard, and when a humming bird comes to have drink, I say "hello Elizabeth, I love you."

Okay. At the risk of "oversharing"... (This is now number three on this site.) But I have to-- because something magnificent happened today. I had a feeling that I'd be receiving a dream visit from Elizabeth when the time was right. It happened this morning. March 17, 2022.  It felt exactly like something she would do.

Context: I've been undergoing radiation treatments lately for cancer. Not fun, but I'm grateful for a course of action with an encouraging prognosis, so I'm doing it. So far, the most concerning after effect has been a kind of fatigue that I’m not used to, but I'm doing it. Not without some trepidation and anticipatory fear before every treatment, but I’m doing it.

This morning, I was scheduled to wake up early (5:30am) in order to prepare and get out the door by 6:30am. But instead of the alarm waking me up, I woke up at 5:20am after a gorgeous dream of being with Elizabeth. We were at The Actors Center in NYC. An “Acting for the Camera” workshop. Working together. Discovering new techniques. Enjoying each other’s talent and humanity. Then somehow, it was time for me to head to my radiation appointment, so we left the class. Took an elevator down to the ground floor of wherever we were.

(Switch to present tense)

Before heading outside, I notice that there’s a large auditorium with a beautiful old fashioned looking stage. I lead the way inside for a closer look. Elizabeth comes in, too. With Winnie, her dog! Winnie is back!! Elizabeth begins to clown around on the stage. We’re laughing and having fun. I’m taking pictures, thinking, “I thought Elizabeth was gone..! I thought Winnie was gone…! But they’re NOT! She’s still here. They’re both still here!”

And then I wake up. I wake up with the strong feeling that I have been VISITED – at a time when I especially need support. And somehow, I am not surprised that she came to visit in this way. It feels like something she would absolutely do for me. Strong and unequivocal loving support. What I’m feeling today, in a very moving way, is the power of her love. And who knows? Perhaps now she’s in a place where she’s learning ways to be more and more identified with expansive and expanding love. Not only for others, but also for herself. This is the kind of “connection dream” that I long for after a loved one passes. So grateful she came to be with me in this way today. XO

I first met Elizabeth at The Actors Center. I probably saw her work in Ron Van Lieu’s acting class, then knew I wanted to get to know her better. Somehow, I must have introduced myself and asked if we could work together. Happily, she agreed. We looked for scenes that might fit--- finally deciding to work on HEDDA GABLER. Elizabeth was a magnificent Hedda. I played poor Tesman discovering that Hedda has thrown Lovborg’s manuscript (his “child”) into the fire--- the horror of it all! And also, the glory of it all--- with Elizabeth inhabiting Hedda in all of her passion and conflict. The thing I remember most is the rehearsal process. We took our time, so that we got to know the play--- and also-- so that we got to know each other. The rehearsals were great. The “getting to know you” part was even greater. Fun and laughter and sharing stories and enjoying being in each other’s company. Trust and building friendship. Today, thinking back almost a decade ago, I feel nothing but gratitude for the times that we spent together. Going forward, Elizabeth is a presence that, for me, feels easy to tune into. Just taking a moment to remember her and her huge heart… Pure nourishment!

Celebrating friendship on Elizabeth’s Bday

Wedding again

AMY & john wedding

My favorite roommate ever

Over and over, while composing a prayer for Elizabeth, I listened to this beautiful arrangement of “Silent Night”…  (By Justin Kauflin and Jacob Collier)

https://www.youtube.com/watch…

I think Elizabeth would love this arrangement.

My wish for Elizabeth is in that song.

“Silent night, Holy night, All is calm, All is bright…"

After reciting an ancient sanskrit text in honor of Elizabeth…. I wrote this prayer:

"I believe that Elizabeth is now free from the burdens, the pressures, the chaos, the depression, the intensity of the challenges that she had been dealing with.

I believe that she

her soul, her being, her unique and individual presence—

wise, compassionate, passionate, STRONG, and powerful--

is in a place where there is

Utmost compassion

Utmost support

Utmost healing

Supreme Love and Light

And I believe that, on some level that I don’t intellectually understand, she is aware of the LOVE—

The love that we are sending to her.

She is aware of our gratitude.

She is aware of (and receiving) all blessings and prayers offered on her behalf.

I believe that every prayer and every loving thought is, indeed, fueling her…

Nourishing her…

Helping her…

Healing her…

Uplifting her soul in its ongoing, onward journey.

I believe in the strength of her spirit.

And I believe that she will be present with me and for me in many, many ways as my life continues to unfold, and also beyond this physical life.

We can’t really say goodbye—because we have connected in the deepest place that human beings can connect… In the deep space of the Heart.

Mutual admiration.

Mutual affection.

Mutual respect and love.

That connection is alive and it will continue to be alive.

Elizabeth, this is my ongoing prayer...

Not only for you and for me-

But also, for ALL your loved ones, your family, and friends.

These words (translated from the sanskrit chant) are how I think of you now--- and how I will continue to think of you—

In the midst of the true, undeniable sadness and grief of losing you in your physical form,

I think of you when I sing these words.

I envision you---  speaking them aloud in your gorgeous voice, and knowing them to be true:

'I am unborn. I am free from old age. My being is without beginning or end. I am unchangeable. I am consciousness and bliss, smaller than the smallest, greater than the greatest.

I am beyond all primeval things. I am everlasting, self-luminous, taintless, and completely pure. I am the supreme ether. I am immovable, blissful, and imperishable.'

Blessing upon blessing upon blessing to you, my dear Elizabeth.

To you and to all who love you!"

xo

Walker

Tim and Stephanie's wedding