Many days of ups and downs. Many days of 2 steps forward and 10 steps back. After countless hours the nurses and doctors finally found a happy medium. Many hoops to jump before we could take you home. A G-Tube placement surgery because you wouldnt take a bottle. Not to mention you were allergic to my milk, let alone Dairy and Soy. A carseat test but you were such a big boy you needed a big boy car seat.  Finally we get the call that said "Hey your gonna be released today". August 16th you FINALLY got to break out of there and come home.  

They attempted to extubate you a couple times but you needed just a bit more assistance and a bit more time. Sunday June 19th we received a call at 730am to let us know that you had successfully been extubated. "Happy Fathers Day"!! Daddy and I flew out of bed and immediately got dressed to come to you. We got to the hospital and got up to the ward. As we rounded the corner we could hear a baby crying, as we got closer to your room we KNEW it was you. Walked into your room and you were screaming at the top of your lungs. 27 DAYS you were intubated and we could not hear your cry. You were still hooked up to a bunch of cords/wires, tubes, and machines. We had to have a nurse come and place you into our arms for us to be able to hold you.  

13 days after your 1st surgery June 6th, surgery #2 was to place a shunt. Once again we were back in that surgery waiting room, pacing, wring hands, emotional. Waiting for the assisting nurse to round the corner to update us every hour on the hour.  Many hours passed as it felt like a lifetime. The final hour came and she rounded the corner and told us they were finishing up and that you would be heading to recovery and back to your room.  Once again I could breath and let out a huge sigh of relief. Back in your room, again all the cords/wires, tubes, and machines were buzzing.  We took it day by day, hour by hour. Waiting on you to come out of sedation and wake up. After a few days of ups and downs, you finally started to stir. You were progressing and they were working on getting your breathing tube out as long as you were stable. 

Out of recovery and nestled back into your baby warmer, I walked in and my heart was in my throat. I wanted to scream, cry, yell, but I wanted to pick you up and hold you so so so bad. You had so many wires, tubes, and machines hooked to you. Your chest was not fully closed as you were swollen and they couldnt close you up all the way. You were sedated and I did not get to see your pretty eyes until May 27th when they were able to wean you off of the sedation. You still had your breathing tube, so we didnt get to hear your cry but I could see that you were trying to tell me something. The days following were long and tedious. I sat with you for hours on end watching the monitors intently. With every beep or woosh of the machines, with every up or down of a number, I was asking questions to know what was going on. You were thriving. Here comes your surgeon telling us surgery #2 was right around the corner. 

The morning of May 25th crept up as daddy and I did not sleep watching the clock. We came to the hospital while it was still dark outside. We got to sit with you until they came to take you back for surgery. All of the emotions swimming around, all of the uncertainties, and the unknowns. Mimi came up there and sat with daddy and me. As the hands on the clock continued to click, the assistant nurse was coming out every hour on the hour to update all of the anxiously waiting loved ones. I watched as the nurse entered the room and went from family to family with updates. After many hours in the waiting room, daddy pacing back and forth, me not being able to sit still, Mimi wringing her hands, the nurse rounded the corner to tell us that the Drs were closing you up and you were going to recovery. A sigh of relief washed over my body and tears welled my eyes, daddy grabbing me and hugging me knowing that you were going back to you room and we would see you in a very short time. 

May 18th, I was released from the hospital but you had to stay. Daddy and I left and went to dinner to celebrate you finally being here. We got a call from a dr telling us some upsetting news. We took the DQ home gave it to Aunt TT and Aunt Meggie and made our way back to the hospital. When we got back we made them explain it again. The dr was telling us that you had a 10% chance of survival. Daddy and I were in a daze trying to make it all make sense. There were only 2 surgeons that could possibly handle your complex case. The 1st surgeon said he was pessimistic about surgery and outcome. We had to wait 24hrs before we could talk to the 2nd surgeon, and that was a VERY scary moment in our lives. You finally fell asleep and daddy and I went home anxiously waiting until morning to find out what could be done. May 19th Dr. Turentine said the surgery was NOT a no but it was a no for now. He was telling us that you had a chance at life and that he felt he could do it. Your tiny little veins were just to small to do anything that day. May 23rd, the drs came to daddy and I and told us that you were having difficulty breathing. You were intubated and put on a breathing tube. I prayed like crazy, everyone I talked to I asked for prayers, good vibes, warm wishes, anything that they possible believed in to be sent our way.  Many prayer chains were started, many silent prayers and wishes were sent out into the universe. On May 24th the dr told us that your veins had quadrupled in size and you were good to go into surgery the next day. 

You were born 8:48pm May 16th 2022. You graced the world weighing in at 10lbs 6ozs, 20.8 inches long with a 14.5 inch head. I pushed for 25 mins. My epidural was late and it never got turned on so I did it all natural. I would not trade that moment. Your daddy and Mimi were in the room supporting me as I pushed you out. I wanted to give up halfway thru pushing but your daddy was right there in my ear telling me I could do it and that you were almost here and that I couldnt give up. After you came out they took your vitals wrapped you up and brought you to see me. You are then whisked away and put in to an incubator. Daddy followed you up until he couldn't anymore. They brought you to come see me before they took you to the CV ICU. You looked like a giant inside that incubator. I didn't get to hold you for the first time until 2:37 a.m. on May 17th.

I found out you were a boy before my 20 week anatomy scan. Your daddy and I were so elated when we found out. Your aunt Andrea(Aunt TT) was with me the day I had the 20 week anatomy scan when the dr told me your heart was special. We knew at that point you were going to be a warrior, a fighter, and that we were so in love with you that it didnt matter what we had to face that we would do it all together as a family.