[Mary] Charlton Gillet Campbell Friedberg (Mimi)

Born June 9, 1925, at the Women’s Hospital in Baltimore, MD

Died on September 14, 2024, at her home in Cross Keys, Baltimore, MD, age 99 1/4

Born Mary Charlton, to Martin Gillet and Charlton Merrick Gillet, ‘Mimi’ and her older sister Betty Charlton Hynson spent her first five years at the Tuscany-Canterbury home at 3909 Cloverhill Rd. The origin of her lifelong nickname dates to childhood; her father would return home from work, calling out “who is that I hear?” and little Charlton would reply “me, me!” In 1929 the family built an elegant ‘country home’ they called Five Acres overlooking Lake Roland, moving in just weeks before Black Friday and the start of the Great Depression. They managed for ten years, but eventually built a more modest home close by in Ruxton, on what was then a cow pasture. This beloved “Deep Woods” home now belongs to another Charlton - their granddaughter - who lives there to this day.

Charlton attended the Bluebird School in Ruxton, the Bryn Mawr School, and graduated from The Greenwood School of Ruxton. She briefly studied French at McGill University in Montreal, and returned home to be a French tutor. She longed to earn a college degree, but as was so common at the time, was told that girls did not need a real education. And as she so often would, Charlton determined she would buck convention. It had to wait until 1980, but she eventually earned an Associates in Arts degree from the Community College of Baltimore.

Charlton was a debutante known for her beauty, her passion for ballroom dancing, and her exceptional singing voice. She considered a career in opera. But post-war life revolved around social engagements and remaining aloof from her many ‘beaus.’ Once asked how many marriage proposals she had received, she waved her hand dismissively: “oh, I have no idea.” She ‘narrowly missed becoming an old maid’ just before her 23rd birthday, when she married Robert McLean Campbell on May 10th, 1948.

Mac and Charlton lived in New York City for several years. He worked in publishing, she as a switchboard operator. But with the 1952 arrival of twin girls, Virginia and Charlton, they left their beloved Manhattan for family support back in Baltimore. Mac joined his father, brother, and cousins at Harry T. Campbell and Sons, and Charlton became the wife behind the businessman. Five years later, their son Gregg joined the twins, ‘Gina’ and ‘Chaddie’.

As a mother and wife, Charlton built an active social life in Baltimore. They were members of the Elkridge club, the Hamilton Street Club, and The Mt. Vernon club. They traveled in Europe, frequented the race track with the Campbells, and played bridge with their children and friends. She took special pleasure in hosting dinner parties with ‘interesting people,’ seeking to connect intelligent and diverse friends who may not otherwise have met. One of her favorite sounds was the murmur of people she had introduced to one another, absorbed in conversation.

But Charlton strayed far outside the bounds for a woman of her time. She felt deeply about a wide range of progressive issues, and actively volunteered for decades. Closest to her heart was Planned Parenthood, for whom she canvassed door-to-door as early as the 1960s, and later sat on the board of the Maryland chapter. She never minced words when it came to support for womens’ rights. She also sat on the boards of Young Audiences of Maryland, Union Memorial Hospital, and the Florence Crittenton Service of Baltimore (for unwed mothers). She volunteered at the Department of Social Services (Baltimore City), Morgan State College, the Johns Hopkins Cultural Resource Center, the Levindale Hebrew Geriatric Center, and Marylanders for the Right to Choose. She passionately supported B-Sharp, a music program at Timothy Baptist Church. Her activism also reached beyond large organizations, and she was well known for helping individuals in her life.

Art, music, scientific discoveries, and fine culture were passionate threads that ran throughout Charlton’s life. She studied art history at Johns Hopkins University, and regularly attended the Everyman Theater and the Baltimore Symphony Orchestra. She was an avid reader of science magazines; one of her final musings was to wish she could see what CRISPR does next. Her deep interest in Chinese history and art was bolstered by a series of graduate students (Zili, Rusong, and Xiaoping) to whom she offered a home-away-from-home. Zili Zhang in particular became part of the family, and a lifelong friend and confidant.

Having made many close Jewish friends in her community work, Charlton became enamored of the culture and values of the Jewish community; she converted to Judaism at a ceremony in September 1976. Though she eventually embraced scientific reasoning above all things spiritual, she felt deeply proud of the ways she had always pushed back against the casual antisemitism around which she was raised. Prejudice of all kinds disturbed her, and when she met someone who had been shut out because of their religion, their sexuality, or their skin, she tried hard to offer a safe harbor.

Having divorced Mac in 1983, Charlton married a second time to Sidney M. Friedberg. They shared a few short, happy years together before Sidney became ill and died in 1985. Charlton remained single for the rest of her life, but she did it with zest. She spent winter months in Key West and Captiva, FL. She often traveled to Chautauqua, NY for summer lectures and music. She loved to simply go driving, taking off on “adventures.” She and Gregg traveled to countless Civil War sites, to a mushroom farm in PA, and to Niagara Falls. Later in life, Warren Hall was her trusted friend and pilot, frequently driving just to “get lost and find our way home.” But her happy place, by far, was the hilltop log home she built in Bedford Co, PA, known to all as Charltonham. Built when she was 60 years old, she spent weeks at a time there in the woods, right up until a few weeks before her death. Her ‘neighborhood’ Pennsylvania friends Jolene Jones and Patti Robinson became trusted friends and caregivers.

“Mimi” was a friend and mother to many. Her legacy was to encourage everyone around her to be learning, always. Having chafed at the limits put on her as a girl, she took special pleasure in helping others explore classes, travel, and adventures that they might not have reached without her. Art classes, theater tickets, piano lessons, scientific study - it was a joy for her to open doors for others. Her highest praise was that someone was curious, a ‘lifelong learner.’ In her bedazzled slippers and her fabulous brooches and caftans, she always enjoyed being a little shocking. And if she could help you follow your passions, well, that was “simply WONderful.”

She is survived by both the family she raised and the family she gathered, including her three children; her three granddaughters, Brett Welch, Meredith Lorenzen, and Jessie Hughes; her niece Germaine Lanaux and grand-niece Sarah Frazier; her great friend Zili Zhang; her cousin Stewart McLean; and her many caregivers and friends.

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