It’s taken me several days to process everything; I wanted to make sure that I was able to write with a clear mind and open heart, because hearing about BJ’s passing was so upsetting to me.

I’ve been friends with the family since I was in middle school, where I met Zach and we became close friends. It wasn’t until I got to high school, however, that I came to know the rest of Zach’s family, especially his brothers. I’ve been priveleged to know Adam, and to see him perform stand-up comedy live. I grew close to Justin through all of our mutual friends, despite our age difference. But to know BJ, and to be his friend, was something special and entirely different.

I can echo all that’s been said about BJ already; I’ve known it and seen it all first hand. What I wanted to share was my first memory of meeting him. I was a freshman in high school, and while it might seem silly now, I was terrifed of not only entering high school, but being a part of the band. Band was never a subject I thought I excelled particularly well at when I was that age, and the thought of being a part of our esteemed program was something I couldn’t wrap my head around. But I remember the first time I was a part of a trumpet “hang” with all of the high schoolers, and BJ was one of my section leaders. From the moment I met him, he made me feel comfortable and accepted amongst my peers-to-be, and treated me as if I was one of his own family members.

That is, to say, he always made me feel that way. BJ was a hero of mine in those early days, and I looked to him more than anyone on how to be the best member of the band that I could. I’m sure, if he was here with us, that he might snicker and say he wasn’t always the model citizen in band. But I always knew to look past his faults and accept him for the good person he was. If there was anything I could take away from his leadership, it was his kindness and loyalty to others, and to always look out for the smaller ones. He might have been the only section leader I knew who talked to everyone the same, and made everyone feel included.

I loved BJ, and miss him terribly. I was always so excited to see him after he left high school, and was always hopeful that he would turn a corner and find peace. While this wasn’t the outcome I wanted, I’m hopeful that he has now found that peace. It’s easy to remember those who treated everyone with respect and dignity, and it’s safe to say that I will never forget what BJ meant to me, and he will always hold a special place in my heart.