I was a few years ahead of Bert at GSW, but he, Sarah Mae, Nate, and I were regulars at the Baptist Student Union.  After I graduated, he became very close to a dear friend of mine, Jay Williams, another incredible human gone too soon. 

I was shocked to hear the news about Bert, and so heartbroken for Sarah Mae and the children. 

I cannot imagine what you are walking through, but please know that we are praying for your peace, strength, and healing. Hugs, the Dallas Family

Bertrum-I have loved you since the day you were born. Hardly a month out from giving birth to your cousin, Grandmama and I headed out trying to get there before you were born.  We were predicting what you would look like (with your mother’s dark skin) and boy were we wrong. You have always been a beautiful boy with a beautiful soul. You definitely got your sweet and kind spirit from your mother.  We love you. We miss you Bert and all of our family will never be the same again. I know God loved you more and He was ready to spend more time with you. We are all so sad but rejoicing this is not the end. Save a place for us at the table Bert!  

Aunt Pat

Bert was such a warm person! He immediately opened up at GFM and joined us in discussing topics about faith in Jesus, life, the heart, sharing his ups and downs with us right from the start. He was so intentional about parenting and sought to love his kids through all his decisions and actions. He talked so proudly about Sarah and her hopes of starting a church in their house. It was clear he not only supported it in speech and through active participation - he beamed every time he talked about her. He just wanted to do right by all the people he loved. We at GFM were privileged to share a little bit of life with him yet so wish we could have shared more. One day we'll rejoin him at the resurrection with Jesus, and we'll enjoy hanging out with our joyful and laid back friend once again. Our and my deepest condolences to the family.

Christmas Coffee with GFM office buddies

When I think about Bert, I think about someone who chose people on purpose.

Before we even moved back to the U.S., Bert and Sarah had already decided to be our friends. They chose to support us before proximity made it convenient. They chose us before we arrived.

Bert let Sarah come stay with us in India before our move. She landed in Patna after nearly 40 straight hours of travel, jetlagged and exhausted. And we promptly swept her off to an Indian wedding! She might have been questioning choosing us at that point! That kind of trust and generosity of spirit opened the doors for a sweet friendship.

Later, when we started our house search over Zoom, Bert and Sarah drove by what is now our house and checked out the neighborhood. Once they assured us we weren’t about to lose all of our money on the investment, we put in an offer. And when it would still be months before we could move in, we found ourselves oddly stressed about something so small: the grass. The previous owners had left behind an old mower, and Bert and JJ offered to mow our yard until we arrived (which was a couple of months).

What we didn’t realize  was that the mower was essentially a relic. The self-propelled feature was broken, and actually worked against you while you mowed! And our yard? A 45 degree angled hill. Bert and JJ never complained. Not once. After we moved in, it took us exactly one attempt at mowing the grass to start the search for a new mower!

For me personally, the move from India to Lawrenceville brought on a deep identity crisis and a fairly crushing depression. I felt displaced from community, purpose, and belonging. I remember one day in particular—I had been sobbing in the basement (where I worked from home) for hours. Dustin came home, and I made a comment that I wasn’t even funny anymore. I come from a long line of storytellers and comedians, and I’ve always considered myself at least mildly entertaining. After all, humor is in my genes. But in my new life, I felt awkward and misunderstood. Like I had lost myself. 

And then one evening with Bert and Sarah, I said something weird, just something offbeat and quirky. And Bert laughed, a really good, full, wholehearted laugh. It seems small. But it wasn’t to me. I felt seen. 

One small gesture at a time, through invitations to Thanksgiving and the Super Bowl, the kinds of things you invite family to, Bert and Sarah made space for us. They welcomed us in when we felt lost. They gave us somewhere to belong. And in those ordinary, yet generous, kind acts, Bert helped me reconnect with pieces of myself that seemed lost.

When I think of Bert, I think of intentional friendship. A servant’s heart. Warmth. Hospitality. A generous spirit. A connector. Kindness. A safe space. Belonging. A good laugh.

We are better because he chose to be our friend. 

Bert and Tempie at cross country meet — with Bert and Tempie

It is hard to put into words our sorrow over hearing this news. Bert, Sarah, and their family were founding members of our mission parish, and from day 1, I knew they would be a profound gift to our community and a blessing to anyone who had the privilege of knowing them. As many have noted, Bert was never without a smile on his face, and more times than I can count, I found him to be a source of great encouragement to me, and his friendship is something I will always treasure. We will continue to hold the Parham family close to heart, and may Bert's memory be eternal.

Bert and the StormKeepers

Chi Phi Composite

Spring into Summer Challenge - Team: Goal Diggers — with Bert Parham

When I first met Bert, he visited my gym and offered to upload photos to our Google listing. Since I am not particularly tech-savvy, I was happy to agree. Bert mentioned that if I liked his work, he’d be interested in a potential partnership; after seeing his initial photos, we began working together and have done so ever since.

Recently, Sarah also began working out with us. It has been a true pleasure to see them both here, side by side, engaging in what we love to do.

Bert was a kind individual with an unforgettable smile. He was responsible for all of our photography and drone videos, collaborating wonderfully with my daughter to bring their shared vision to life. We were actually preparing to start a new video project and had a meeting scheduled in the coming weeks to finalize the details.

I recently recalled a funny detail that perfectly captured his spirit. While I was driving to visit Sarah, my daughter—who was following me—called to say I was going the wrong way. I insisted my GPS was correct. Bert had once told her he lived "across the street" from the gym and would just run over for a quick workout. In true fashion, he never mentioned that it was actually a two-mile run each way. To him, it wasn't a big deal.

He loved to run, he loved to work out, he loved his family, and he loved life. Bert was part of our family, too, and we will miss him terribly.

BSU Spring Formal — with Bert and Joshua Linker

BSU Fall Ball

BSU Spring Formal — with Bert and Sarah Parham

My Wedding — with Bert, Shannon Whiting, Jay Pope, James Sammons and Joshua Linker

I met Sarah my second year of college.  She became one of my best friends and as I was a new believer she also became a bit of a spiritual mentor.  I did not meet Bert until my last year of college.  I shared an apartment with him and and 3 other guys (5 of us all together).  I liked Bert immediately.  As many have stated he was always smiling.  Even if he was frustrated, or angry, still somehow smiled.  He also had a very distinctive laugh that you go to hear often.  Like Sarah, he ended up being a part of my spiritual formation.  I had never been involved with any kind of an accountability group, but Bert and a few other guys invited me to join one with them.  We would meet outside I believe at a sonic and studied a book together and discussed accountability, why sin was bad, how to properly fight sin, and just generally the importance of Christ in our lives and brothers to help point us to Christ constantly.Due to age, most of my specific memories have faded, but Bert's kindness and joy has always remained.  I used to tell people that if I had met Bert sooner I think we would have ended up as much closer friends.  This sentiment, led to me having him as one of my groomsmen at my own wedding.  Life kept us from getting together often after school but every encounter was always a great one.  My prayers for the family he leaves behind will be lifted as often as they come to mind.

Jay & Bert, two good men gone too soon.

Sarah,

Words cannot possibly touch the grief you are surely experiencing. I am just so sorry for your loss, and am praying for God's hand over you and your family as you walk this valley. May his comfort blanket you,  and his peace keep you still.  

Bert exemplified the fruit of the spirit listed in Galations 5 - love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, to name a few. Two that stand out were joy and kindness. 

Bert and I were the same age and in school at the same at Georgia Southwestern. We spent a fair amount of time together in and around the Baptist Student Union and through in-common friends. I can't ever remember Bert without a smile on his face - not a smile because he was in a good mood. Bert always smiled and laughed because that's who he was...because of the joy in his heart. As a result, I liked being around him. 

Kindness. Bert and I were studying together at his apartment later in college, and he unintentionally taught me a valuable lesson about speaking kindly of others. Through the course of conversation, I brought up  someone we both knew in a not-so-positive light. I asked Bert what he thought of the person, and he said "he's a good friend of mine." I've never forgotten that conversation, and there are many who can say about Bert that he was a good friend. Sarah - Leah and I are praying for you and your family.

Over the years I'd see Bert at 12Stone and for a time at the Monday AM small group. That said, the last opportunity we really had a chance to chop it up was when he and I had lunch in the Suwanee Town Center.  We both were leading small businesses and we had a chance to talk shop about our work, and even a cross-over project. That said, we also talked about growth and expansion, and what that could mean. I really appreciated his care to be Christ-led and true to himself (and not swayed by the pressure of the world's expectations), especially in that moment as I was feeling the pressure of entrepreneurship. As so many have said, he was so kind and present, and I'll miss that the most when reflecting on our friendship. God bless brother...

Bert was active for JJ's basketball cheer section, and I'm grateful for all of the support Sarah and Bert have given to Cub Scout Pack420 and BSA Troop419. Truly a warm heart.

Bert invited me to an Atlanta United game almost 8 years ago. It was a lot of fun but what I remember most was how much it meant that he would invite me out of the blue.