Memories of Thomas Penn Mardis

In memory of

Thomas Penn Mardis

Winston-Salem, NC, USA

February 6, 1947 - April 11, 2018

Feb 6, 1947 - Apr 11, 2018

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Amy Harrelson

Dad decided he would take up ice skating with me. He was doing so well I wanted to get a video, and of course, wanted to make sure the video was short and sweet.

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Amy Harrelson

2015, Old Salem Museums & Gardens, Old Salem Road, Winston-Salem, NC, USA

Halloween

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Amy Harrelson

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Victoria Mardis

Miss you every single day!

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Victoria Mardis

Ruthie Anderson

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Victoria Mardis

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Judy Roughton Mardis

Someone once said, “You don’t know how to live until you’ve been told your going to die.”

Tom could always spar with you on most any topic because he was such a lifelong learner with an incredibly curious mind. So he and I had discussed the topic of God from time to time.

Now, Tom’s read the Bible cover to cover, so recently, during one conversation I just reminded him of John 3:16, “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.” His response was, “Yeah…well I’m a little skeptical.” I said I know, but no harm in keeping an open mind. He said, “Well, you are right about that.” We chuckled and moved on, probably to something about the way the brain functions because this was one of his many fascinations.

His diagnosis didn’t interfere with his drive to keep learning, so he started a new scientific endeavor, named Mind Over Matter. He spent lots of time researching the differences between the brain and the mind and could speak of it with great precision. I understand he had an elite group of comrades, a think tank I suppose; maybe planning for world peace, using mind over matter or something. I’m pretty sure some of you are with us today, so please forgive me if I’ve misspoken.

Sitting outside, I’d hear him describe colors of the simplest things; he noticed light filtering through the door or trees with childlike wonder. I said, “Tom, you seem more alive than ever.” His response was, “It took me about five seconds to figure that out…”

I watched him, as he shared of himself with all of his family and many friends in wonderful ways during his illness.

We were sitting in the kitchen and the adults were talking, when Corbin walked up to Tom and with pure adoration said, “I love you Granddaddy.” Tom heard him and for a moment, moved from a very adult world, to see, really see Corbin. He said, “I love you too.” Corbin, now satisfied, ran off to play.

So many times, in the middle of a crowded room, Tom and Victoria caught each other’s attention and they communicated without words, with a language of great love and knowing, for each other. He and his children, and brothers and sisters, nieces and nephews, had touching honest moments together. It was just a joyful time of healing.

But then there was one moment when he was struck with fear. I just happened to be near him, so I knelt down in front of him and took both of his hands and held on. I looked in his eyes wishing there was something I could do. He averted his at first, but then his eyes met mine. ------------- Everything changed. His body relaxed, and his smile returned. All I know is that in that amazing moment, both of us experienced deep peace. That was God’s peace.

Bill and I were back home and the two of them were talking on the phone. As I walked through the kitchen, Bill told him I wanted to talk to him! I wasn’t aware that I wanted to talk to him, but learned that’s the Mardis boys. Tom picked up the conversation as if we’d been talking for hours. He shared that he’d struggled some. I reminded him of Isaiah 41:10, “do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God.” I said, “Tom you’re never alone.
He said … “I know… I know.”

Tom’s senses were heightened because of this journey he found himself on, and my guess is he must have had some very interesting conversations with the Lord during the early hours of morning. But he knew he was not alone.

Dallas Willard said, “The most important thing about you is not the things that you achieve; it is the person that you become.” Tom was a wonderful man and it was my great honor to have learned from him during his greatest need.

I’d like to end with Numbers 6:24-26
“The LORD bless you and keep you; the LORD make his face shine on you and be gracious to you; the LORD turn his face toward you and give you peace.”

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Ruthie Anderson

Susan King DeRamus

What a wonderful friend! Tom had so many special qualities...fun loving, intelligent, creative, kind, generous and steady. He loved everything about his hometown... it’s history, industries and anything RJR but most of all he loved his beautiful wife Victoria, children and family.
He was quick to remind his friends of “the good old days”, he missed, like the 50-60’s music or when flying was easy-no hassle or the aroma of sweet tobacco floated freely. We will miss our friend but take comfort in knowing he now has mastered the mystery of life which he so enjoyed!

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Ruthie Anderson

Victoria Mardis

Lynne Fleischman

2016, Winston-Salem, NC, USA

First gathering at 5 Points

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Ruthie Anderson

Victoria Mardis

Vicki Radford

I found this picture of Tom and Bill at our 39th reunion! I just remember how much fun they had telling their stories of growing up in Ardmore and their escapades together!
Tom was a special man and will surely be missed.

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Victoria Mardis

Vicki Radford

Ruthie Anderson

Victoria Mardis

Chris Davis Fox

2016

Tom rounded us up monthly for our post-reunion, RJR Class of ‘65 get togethers, and was usually center stage. We will all miss his friendship, but continue that bond he and Harold Smith started.

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Ruthie Anderson

Victoria Mardis

Clair Hetherington

Comments:

Victoria Mardis

Tom takes center stage at his brother's wedding. Me...in the back with that Oh my Goodness look. Hahaha! ... Read more Tom takes center stage at his brother's wedding. Me...in the back with that Oh my Goodness look. Hahaha! Judy just smiled knowing... Read more Tom takes center stage at his brother's wedding. Me...in... Read more

Clair Hetherington

We had the privilege of being around Tom only a few times but we feel like we have known him for many years. He was so gregarious and had the same wonderful sense of humor as Bill. We love this picture from Bill and Judy’s wedding where Tom stole the show. You can see how many family members were smiling but just look at Victoria’s face! It has been a blessing to celebrate some very special occasions with this family.
Love to all,
Scott, Clair and Laurie Hetherington

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Victoria Mardis

Comments:

Victoria Mardis

Love it!!! Thanks Clair. :) Love it!!! Thanks Clair. :) Love it!!! Thanks Clair. :)

Trish Black

So sorry to hear this news. You are all in our prayers.

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Victoria Mardis

Mary Gump

Sorry just doesn't seem enough. You could tell what a good person Tom was just by talking with him. Condolences and prayers for the family.

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Victoria Mardis

Sig Johnsen

Tom was a wonderful person who went to the trouble with Harold Smith to bring all of us back together each month following our fantastic 50th Reunion.. He will be missed by all of us and just hope this monthly event will continue so we can keep his spirit alive !... Sig Johnsen

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Victoria Mardis

Comments:

Victoria Mardis

Sig is surely missed by all his RJR friends. Sig is surely missed by all his RJR friends. Sig is surely missed by all his RJR friends.

Sandy Spaugh

2017, Winston-Salem, NC, USA

At monthly mini reunion of RJR ‘65 Class. Left to right, Donna Binkley Smith, Sandy Culler Spaugh , Donna Crook and sweet Tom.

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Ruthie Anderson

Victoria Mardis

Sandy Spaugh

2017, Winston-Salem, NC, USA

Although I miss him, now when I think of him, I think of his now restored health in eternity and I smile. I believe we will see him again. God is good and will bless us all as we heal from the loss of our friend. I am so glad I got to know him better after fifty plus years. To Victoria and Tom’s entire family, You are all in my prayers. I am so sorry for your loss.

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