Who is my dad

My dad and I were always very close. Growing up it was always him and me. We did everything together from working on our little boat to being at the cabin together. He understood me like no other and I understood him. He was looking into a mirror when he saw me. As little girl he taught me I could accomplish anything I set my mind to. He told me I could be anything I wanted to be. He told me that every person I met should be greeted with a firm handshake. This was at a time when women were taught to shake hands with a soft and limp wrist. He shared in any success I had and he was the first one I wanted to share the news with. When ever I was promoted he was the first to know and to cry with pride. He was always so proud of me.

He kept his feelings to himself and never shared what was bothering him. He was taught that men don’t cry and don’t show emotion. He never knew how to express himself. He used teasing as a way to show you he liked you. If he never teased you than he really didn’t like you. Many people didn’t like him due to this.

He had anxiety & anger issues that many people saw firsthand.

Guess what? We all have issues. He never wanted people to see his pain, insecurities, or weaknesses.

He also had the biggest heart and I saw that regularly. Not many people saw the side of him that few saw. He loved my mom with all his troubled heart. In the last few years of challenges with my moms health he thought he could manage these on his own. I didn’t give him enough credit for all he dealt with while trying to care for himself amongst his own battles with cancer & anxiety. A few months ago he got on some new medication and I saw my dad from my childhood again. He was happy, kind, and loving again. He tried so hard with my moms illness.

My daughter told me that every generation of us gets better and I hope I’m representation of that. My dad was a huge part of who I am today and I’m PROUD to be the daughter of Steve smith.