Stanley E. Petelinz

June 25, 1953 – September 17, 2023

What do comic books, a dairy, backgammon, wineries, and a Mini Cooper have in common? They’re all part of the remarkable life of Stanley Edmund Petelinz, a true Renaissance man. Born in Newburgh, NY, his father, Martin owned Petelinz Dairy, and his mother Helen was a Registered Nurse – together, they were champion ballroom dancers.

As a child, Stan loved building with his erector set, reading comic books, and playing for long hours outside with his friends. Later on, he played lacrosse (loved it!) and worked with his father in the dairy (hated it!). Stan’s father passed away when he was in high school, and he completed his studies in military school. After graduation, he enlisted in the Army and served 2 tours in Vietnam. He attended Cornell University on the GI Bill and earned a BA degree. After college, Stan hitchhiked across the country (NY to San Francisco); part of the adventure was being struck by lightning on the side of a highway! He settled in the Napa Valley and earned a degree in Viticulture (winegrowing) from UC Davis. Stan worked in a small vineyard and was proud to say he planted some of Mondavi’s first crops.

While in Napa, he married, and his son Martin was born in 1982. Always the handyman (we nicknamed him “Tool Man”), Stan built a complete second story onto their home. As an avid San Francisco 49ers fan, he loved to recount that he was at Candlestick Park for “the Catch” game (Joe Montana to Dwight Clark) the year Martin was born. He maintained his vineyard until 1987. The family moved to Sacramento, where Stan got into technology.

In 1990, they moved to Bellingham, WA where he ran Mt. Baker Vineyards, doubling its output in his 3 years there. Then Stan fulfilled a childhood dream of owning a comic book shop -- Paper Heroes in downtown Bellingham. After the comic book/trading card crash of 1993, Stan went back into tech, working with Blackburn Office Equipment, where he became one of the principals. During his time in WA, he frequently traveled to Las Vegas -- he was a high roller poker player for 3 years. (Martin recalls enjoying the limo rides and free food, especially “waffles as big as my head!”) Stan and Martin shared a love of Washington’s natural beauty, outstanding wine, and a true sense of adventure.

In 1999, Stan met Michelle while playing online backgammon. In those dial-up days, games had named avatars, and Michelle was intrigued by his, “SpiritKeeper.” They began chatting over their nightly games (Michelle was in NY, he was in WA). After 18 months they forged a deep, loving mental connection, unencumbered by appearances. When they finally did meet in person, that connection only strengthened; they knew they were destined to be together. Their wedding officiant agreed, declaring their relationship was “made in the stars.”

Their marriage in December 2001, in Raleigh began a journey of love, adventure, challenges, and joys, which included raising Michelle’s son Jordan from elementary school to adulthood.

Stan became proud parent, mentor and friend. By marrying into the family, Stan joined in the New England Patriots fandom (actually, fanaticism), but maintained his love of the 49ers. (Luckily, they never faced each other in the Super Bowl!) In Raleigh, Stan returned to tech as owner of Endpoint Data Services.

Stan and Michelle loved to travel, visiting California, Arizona, Montreal, the Outer Banks, Massachusetts, Curacao, and St. Lucia in addition to many outdoor festival destinations for Michelle’s work. Those festivals proved another skill – master packer, fitting seemingly an impossible number of items into any vehicle! Yes he was “pack man” too.

An artist in his own right, Stan was the biggest fan of Michelle’s art and built her Kindred Spirit Studios website as well as all of the substrates for her mixed media pieces. They often collaborated on designs and their outdoor festival booth set up was his pride and joy.

Another pride and joy was his car, a red Mini Cooper! From day one, it became an obsession – as evidenced by the continuous mechanical tweaks and improvements, the decals that made it more and more distinctive, and his full wardrobe of Mini shirts and accessories. Although he chose an automatic so Michelle could drive it, somehow, he was the one always behind the wheel, happily zipping around town.

Stan and Michelle weathered storms (literally: hailstorms, hurricanes and a tornado), and were displaced by a house fire in early 2020. Through it all, their love, sense of humor, and support of good friends -- plus exceptional wine and sushi -- made all things bearable. Stan was the loving center of our family. Each of us – Michelle, Martin, Jordan, Colin, Cameron kitty, Luna and I – are deeply grateful for his presence in our lives. Stan, you will be profoundly missed but you are forever in our hearts.

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