Raymond P. King was born in 1966 in Chicopee Falls, MA, at Westover Air Force Base. He was the tenth and last child of Robert and Alma King, who nearly passed away during his birth. Before Ray could celebrate his first birthday, he battled a severe case of spinal meningitis and was given only a 30 percent chance of survival. He returned home to a family eager to help him relearn his first words and how to walk. His family remembers young Ray as a “dimpled, sweet boy full of life, with happy dancing feet and a precocious vocabulary.”

In 1970, at four years old, Ray moved with his family to Arvada, CO. He excelled in school, where his many artistic talents, creativity and love of cars and car design emerged. His lifelong love of animals began early on, and he cared for family dogs Bobo and Bugs with joy and compassion. In 1980, he began high school at Arvada West. Two years later, he joined his parents in Saudi Arabia and attended American Community Schools, a boarding school in Athens, Greece. He returned to Colorado to graduate from Arvada West High School in 1984.

At the University of Colorado at Boulder, Ray took courses including architecture and art for the first two years, finally deciding to pursue his passion for theatre. In 1986, he auditioned for and was accepted into the university’s Bachelor of Fine Arts theatre program in the Acting Track where he became part of a tight-knit group of student actors. Ray took many intensive classes, studying Meisner and Alexander techniques, Shakespeare, Chekhov and many contemporary playwrights. He appeared as Wesley in a local production of Curse of the Starving Class by Sam Shepard. Ray managed a full schedule of classes and performances all while working his way through school at the popular Gondolier restaurant, where he frequently helped out his fellow student artists with comped spaghetti meals on the sly.

Ray moved to San Francisco in 1991, where, shortly thereafter, he landed a role in two of the one-act plays in Robert Patrick’s Untold Decades produced at Josie’s Juice Joint. During rehearsals of one of the plays, Odd Number, Ray met the love of his life, Kevin, who succumbed to Ray’s charms after marching in San Francisco’s 1991 gay pride parade to promote the production of Untold Decades. Some twelve months later they were sharing a Victorian house on Fulton Street near Alamo Square with border terrier Angus “Gus” McGee, a gray tabby Bijoux, and a series of housemates, some of whom remain great friends today.

Ray and Kevin loved to travel. In addition to visiting and vacationing with friends and family across the U.S. and its territories, they had great fun traveling to such destinations as Canada, Mexico, Bali, Hong Kong, Argentina, Uruguay, Morocco, France, Tanzania, Costa Rica, India and Scandinavia. Multiple times they took advantage of cheap airfares and flew to London in January where they braved the cold and indulged their passion for theatre, seeing West End productions, sometimes two shows a day. Ray and Kevin also supported and enjoyed Bay Area theatre, subscribing to Berkeley Repertory Theatre, American Conservatory Theater and Best of Broadway.

Ray supported his theater and travel interests by working in a series of San Francisco’s fine dining establishments followed by a job at the Hotel Nikko where he worked banquets. His fine dining service was so valued at the hotel that he was the only employee trusted to serve the Japanese prime minster during the 2023 APEC conference. In 2003, Ray bought an old letterpress, fixed and repaired it into operation, and started his own letterpress business, Prosper Press. For eight years—until the great recession—he produced beautiful invitations, announcements, and card stock for clients across the country.

In 2002, Ray and Kevin migrated to Oakland, where they eventually purchased a fixer-upper next to Peralta Creek. Their family included border terriers Ratatouille Louie (died 2012) and Onie, and the little dog most intertwined with Ray’s heart, Tulah Belle. Most mornings would find Ray on the sofa, a coffee on the end table, his iPad on his lap (opened to the New York Times or a car magazine), and Tulah Belle curled up beside him.

Despite his keen interest in motor vehicles, mechanical devices on wheels were not always Ray’s friend. Over the years, Ray received the worst of collisions while operating cars, bicycles and scooters. And it wasn’t just wheeled modes of transportation. Kevin loved to go whitewater river rafting and Ray reluctantly went along. Invariably, he’d pop out of the raft and into the river. But eventually he grew to enjoy rafting. Together he and Kevin rafted in Quebec, California, Maine, Argentina, Costa Rica and on a glorious 16-day trip through the Grand Canyon.

But cooking and food were probably Ray’s greatest passion. His maxim was “food is love.” Amongst his friends and family he was known for inventive and delicious menus served at dinner parties and barbecues on the patio. Thanksgiving was a particularly noteworthy affair, with upwards of 20 guests seated at various tables around the house. “Pot luck” was not in his vocabulary. Guests were admonished to remove themselves from the kitchen while he was cooking. Ray liked to combine travel and food, taking part in culinary tours abroad, and bringing what he learned to his dishes. Most recently, and for the second time, he served a Oaxacan Thanksgiving dinner using recipes he learned during a 2008 “Chile Lovers Tour” of mountain villages in Mexico.

His love of food and cooking was complimented with his interest in gardening. Within a triangle of land next to the creek he constructed raised garden beds and grew beans, squash, tomatoes, zucchini, and other vegetables. Throughout the yard he grew and harvested lemons, oranges, plums and figs. This produce ended up in his dishes or in preserves that became gifts to his loved ones.

In 2006 Ray was diagnosed with Adult-Onset Type 1 diabetes. For the most part he received the health care needed to keep his blood sugar under control. But Ray also struggled with an addiction to alcohol. The two maladies came to a head when on December 9th Ray died of severe hypoglycemia.

Preceding Ray in death are his mother Alma King, née Schwab, and brother Richard King. Ray is survived by his husband, Kevin J. Jackson, his father Robert King of Loveland, CO, his sisters Patricia Diffendale of Belchertown, MA, Mary Merrick of Petaluma, CA, and Sharon Fiore of Denver, CO; brothers Robert King Jr. of South Lake Tahoe, CA, David King of West Bloomfield, MI, Michael King of Denver, CO, James King of Loveland, CO, and Thomas King of Stamford, CT; numerous nieces, nephews, and great-nephews.

No flowers please. Donations in Ray’s memory may be made to his favorite charity, St. Jude Children’s Research Hospital.

A Celebration of Ray’s life will be held from 1-3 p.m. on Friday, January 26, 2024, at Piedmont Community Hall, 711 Highland Avenue, Piedmont, CA. Light refreshments and beverages will be served. No pot-luck dishes, please. Dress comfortably. 

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