I’m lacking in words . . . but not tears.
Grieving the loss of you, is so much. It’s taken awhile to sum up the courage to face writing this down. It makes things - feel. more. real. and. yet. not.
How can I hold the gratitude of getting to talk with you on your final day communicating & eating as well as a shattered heart that cancer took you.
“I love you so much it hurts,” you spoke into my ear as I held you.
“You always cut the pecans perfectly,” you took the energy to remind me - I had long forgotten.
As an 18 year old I flew across the country with only a couple duffle bags - you received me only the way a mama can, & we went through Bed Bath & Beyond for comforters & pillows like it was our mission.
You dropped me off at college for preseason with a smile on your face letting me know I’d be alright. And then welcomed me ‘home’ every Thanksgiving & Easter all those years. What a highlight of my life story.
You cared for me after I got my tonsils removed - I think you laughed at me for days with how out of it I was in the recovery room. Then there was the wisdom teeth out a few years later, & helping ship me off to Guatemala & El Salvador for a short term mission trip.
I will always remember how you wouldn’t let me load the dishwasher - you were particular about that. And my name is still carved in your kitchen table.
Thank you for the trip of a lifetime to New York - the food, sights, & broadway . . . what a treat.
I went Black Friday shopping for the first time with Abby & you gave me my first Easter basket - as an adult lol - & it was the best!
You always pursued me with question after question, never letting the lime light come back to you for long. And then there’s the fact that you had a ‘secret’ Instagram (not your name) so you could keep up with all of us without having to interact with others. 😄
I’m so privileged to have had you as a second mama. And I’m so sorry your wonderful hubby, kids, & grandkids have to walk this side of eternity without you now. 🥺
You were the best! Even in your final days I saw your spunk as you got frustrated there were no potato chips for you to snack on in the house.
Love you. That’s all I have for now.