I have a lot of fun memories with my cousin, Damien, and our uncle Kevin when I was younger. Watching them play video games, tagging along with them to the park, and occasionally running for my life as they chased me with Nerf guns around the house.

But the memory that takes the cake was when Damien and his band came and visited us in Colorado. They were playing a gig out in our neck of the woods and stopped by our house for a homemade meal before the show. They pulled up in their blacked out band van that was jam packed with instruments, gas station food, and energy drink cans. Now as a 37 year old adult and father, I look back at that van as a total liability on wheels…and if I knew one of my kids were in that thing it would have added more than a few grey hairs on my head…but as a young teenager, I thought it was the coolest thing on planet earth.

That night we went out to the venue where they were performing. It was myself, my mom and my dad (shoutout to my parents for chaperoning…I think they were the only adults there without gauges, tattoos, or a mohawk)  When we arrived there was a long line stretching outside the doors with a couple of guys running security at the front. It felt like I was in a movie because the moment we arrived, Damien appeared and brought us not only to the front of the line but right inside the doors. I felt like a little celebrity, and we weren’t inside for more than a few moments before Damien had loaded me up with clothes, stickers, CD’s, and an awesome hoodie that was all ‘on the house’.

My parents and I sat there on the top balcony watching Damien and the band jam out while the crowd was mosh-pitting below and going totally nuts. It was awesome. Damien seemed larger than life to me as a young teen. He was in a band! He was traveling! He was on the radio! People knew him! And he took an evening and a handful of moments to make his younger cousin feel pretty special.

I’ve never forgotten that. There were many times after that night I would be at school wearing The Deviates hoodie he’d given me and people would stop me and say, “Oh man, you like The Deviates? I love those guys!” I’d beam with pride and tell them it was my cousin’s band.

Over the past handful of years our communication has been infrequent…but when we did talk he’d always ask me, “What’s up cuz?” We’d talk for a bit, quickly catch up, and then he’d always close with, “Love ya cuz.”

Miss you Dame. Love ya cuz.