Hi all,
Thank you to those who have reached out, shared pictures, and told stories about Ben. My greatest comfort has been hearing from Ben's loving friends and colleagues, and knowing that he felt your love even in his darkest moments. Ben and I were close from childhood, and I'm so grateful for our relationship - we would talk and text frequently, and he visited me many times while I lived in Chicago (and once after we moved to Phoenix). Wherever we were, we'd take each other's call (or often play phone tag, leaving silly voicemails for each other); we'd put our personal lives on pause to be there for each other. We argued, but we always talked through our challenges; even when we were angry, we were best friends.

Ben was gentle, driven, talented, thoughtful, and above all, extremely intelligent. He built his own computer, coached kids and adults in tennis, and dedicated himself to bodybuilding. He loved animals, and they loved him. When he was struggling, he would always call me - including most recently before he passed. As I'm writing this, tomorrow would be his 30th birthday. We will be healing, but never fully healed.

I hope in reading this you find solace that Ben's death was long planned, even during his happier times, and that the method was quick, peaceful, and painless. I'm comforted by the idea that he's no longer hurting, and I will carry his memory and his spirit in everything I do, for the rest of my life.
Love,
EC