Hello, everyone. My name is Mary. We share so much and yet, our grief is unique, as is our story, our lives, and as is the grief of the one we lost, in this life.....as far as we know. I am very grateful that I can just write this to you. Thank you for taking the time to read this. I cannot bear being so alone in what I am experiencing and I do not want anyone else to suffer as much as I am, even knowing that no one can compare another's loss. I need help.
Grace
Posted by Anonymous on Nov. 14, 2022, 9:09 p.m. PST
Hi Mary, I’m so sorry for your loss and that you must now belong to this group of parents who live with such knowing. Time lessens the wounded ness but it never ever leaves our heart, mind, psyche. I tell myself everyday “I must accept”. I wish you peace Mary. I remember the first months saying to my husband while in public “doesn’t anyone see us? Don’t they KNOW we need help”. He only could drive us around tears streaming down our faces answering “no sweetheart”. I cry now remembering those dark dark days. I wish you out of the woods. Xoxo. Johnnys mom.
Dear "Johnny's mom", What a kind response to me. How thoughtful and really wise and intelligent. It is an education in a part of life I never wanted to know. I've known we are backward in our culture when it comes to grieving and understanding and caring but I never knew how backward until this catastrophe visited my backyard. Gracie's death is a tragedy and there are so many layers, even a backlash, an aftermath, that was unexpected. Now, the holidays when I would look forward to seeing her. She could be so funny. I thank you, so much, for letting me in. You are articulate, loving, and honest. I wish you well.xoxoGrace's mom
Dear Johnny's mom, I want to thank you for your almost poetic description of these dark days. I have so much sorrow. The smallest of things can send me to sobs, not to mention the worst, which can also set me off into anger. This group of "knowing" is a singular experience, like no other and I so appreciate knowing you are "out there", thinking of me. I wish you and your husband peace and during these holiday days we might have had with our loved ones here, may some bright Light of their Love give us hope that they are not far away. xoxoxo...Grace's mom
I do not know what to do with the 31 years of priceless artwork and artifacts that I have saved of her life. All options are not good. I am struggling with interment.
I began a Facebook page, although I resisted this for a long time. Approaching the one year anniversary last summer, I was desperate, alone, grief getting worse, not better. I have survived but daily look for her, hear her in songs and find myself generally lost. After struggles to return to my "former life", I have finally realized that I cannot do this.
Celebrating my second daughter, while not mixing all of this into her life, has caused a whole other level of challenge and agony. While grief brought us closer, it also separated us. help
