Jay Dehner, a devoted husband, father, brother, uncle, son, and friend, passed away, leaving behind a legacy of love, integrity, and an unwavering presence that shaped the lives of everyone who knew him. He lived with deep purpose, always carrying himself with strength, kindness, and a quiet confidence that made people feel safe, valued, and understood.

Born to Gerald and Rosamond Dehner, Jay was raised in Fort Wayne, Indiana, alongside his siblings—Greg, Jane, Ann, Susan, and Deborah. Their bond was shaped by countless moments together—celebrating milestones, facing challenges, and creating memories that spanned a lifetime. No matter where life took him, his connection to his family remained strong, influencing the way he approached relationships, work, and the world around him.

Jay was the beloved husband of Chloe, his greatest love and partner in life’s journey. Together, they built a home filled with laughter, warmth, and loving support. He was also the proud and devoted father of Grace, Olivia, and Avery, three children who were the center of his world. He led by example, teaching them the importance of kindness, resilience, and finding joy in both the grand adventures and the quiet moments of life.

Jay attended St. Jude Elementary and later Bishop Dwenger High School, where he built lasting friendships and developed the drive that would carry him through life. He went on to study engineering at Arizona State University, earning both his bachelor’s and master’s degrees in geotechnical civil engineering. It was during this time that he discovered his love for the West—the vast landscapes, rugged peaks, and endless opportunities for adventure.

That passion for the outdoors extended beyond admiration; Jay sought to experience it fully. With a unique and everlasting group of friends (including some from Fort Wayne), he took on challenges that most only dream of, including summiting mountains like Mount Rainier. Their bond, strengthened through life, was something rare—built on love, adventure, and an unbreakable connection that endured across time and distance.

After graduating, Jay began his 41-year-long career with Jacobs (previously CH2MHill), where his intelligence, dedication, and leadership made a lasting impact. His work brought him to Spokane, Washington, where he built a life rooted in a profound connection to nature. 

Jay had a rare and powerful ability to bring people together, not with volume, but with the depth of his character. People naturally gravitated to him no matter the circumstance—drawn to the love, respect, and warmth he carried for others. He had a way of lifting people up, holding space for them, and ensuring they knew they mattered.

Jay wasn’t the first to speak, nor the loudest in the room, but he had an instinct for letting a moment build, waiting for the exact right time to deliver a line that made the joke ten times funnier. His humor was effortless—sharp but never harsh, witty but never forced—always paired with a knowing glance or the smallest smirk that let you in on the moment. Whether in an intense situation, a casual conversation, or a quiet night with friends, Jay had a way of lightening the mood, bringing people together, and turning ordinary moments into something special. More than just making people laugh, he made them feel part of something bigger—a shared experience of joy, connection, and belonging that only he could create.

One of his greatest gifts was his ability to live fully in the moment. Whether standing in the stillness of the forest, climbing a mountain, or sitting across from a friend, he was completely present. He didn’t rush through life or let distractions pull him away from what mattered. To Jay, life was not about chasing the next thing—it was about being here, now, and embracing the connection in front of him.

Jay leaves behind a world that is better because he was in it. His family, friends, and all who had the privilege of knowing him will carry his legacy forward in the way they love, lead, and care for those around them.

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