I met Cyrus Talati in 1975 during my freshman year in college at UC Berkeley. Cyrus and Bruce Powell, one of my good friends, were lab partners in chemistry class. I don't recall exactly how Cyrus and I met, but I think it was when Bruce and Cyrus were studying together at one of the libraries on the Berkley campus. Bruce and I both commuted to class from Marin County, while Cyrus lived in International House. I had only sparse interaction with Cyrus initially, but when I moved into International House at the beginning of my second trimester that year, we became good friends. Cyrus, quite simply, was a joy to be around. He was kind, friendly, had a terrific sense of humor, and was amazingly humble and unaffected despite his extreme social popularity and remarkable good looks. We studied together, ate together, blasted rock 'n' roll together in the I-House music room, and just enjoyed each other's company. Cyrus brought me into his large circle of friends and ultimately made my International House days the some of the most enjoyable ones I ever had as a young man. I left Berkeley after my freshman year, but every summer when I returned to California Cyrus and I spent lots of time together. This continued every year until Cyrus went away to Boston University and I began my clinical rotations at medical school. I did attend Cyrus and Jenny's wedding here in California in 1985, but after this we eventually lost touch. This in no way diminished the impact our friendship had on me. I just cannot imagine what those years would have been like without Cyrus.
In the weeks before his passing, I phoned Cyrus several times and we shared some choice memories from those years. I'd like to also share them here on Cyrus' Memorial - I know he would like that.
The Cone Slalom -
Cyrus, Bruce Powell and I spent a lot of time together in those early college days. We'd frequently drive across the Richmond-San Rafael Bridge, since Bruce and I were both originally from Marin County. One particular day we were driving across the bridge - I think Cyrus and I were in my car and Bruce was in his - when we noticed a long line of orange rubber construction cones spanning the entire bridge's length. Intermittently there were "Men at Work" signs spaced out along the bridge, but of course, as usual, there were no men working. Well, I drove too close to one of the cones early on in the crossing and mistakenly ran over it. Cyrus noticed that the cone, after being compressed by the car's tire, jumped high in the air. Immediately excited, he said something like "hey, let's do that again - ha ha!" Cyrus also noticed that the cone jumped sideways after we hit it, and so he had the idea that if we clipped one just right it might jump over the guard rail into the bay. And so, the Cone Slalom began. Every few cones, we'd swerve towards one and try to clip it at just the right angle to flip it into the water. Then, when I looked in the rear view mirror, I noticed that Bruce had caught on and had started aiming for some of remaining the cones. Even better, as we progressed across the bridge, other cars began to join in. By the time we neared the end of the bridge, there were cars swerving and weaving all over the place and there were cones flying everywhere! Towards the end of the slalom, I actually got one of cones to jump over the rail - this precipitated immediate laughter and applause from Cyrus and lots of honking from the cars behind us. Tremendous fun for us mischievous college kids! Looking back, we were lucky there were no California Highway Patrol cars on the bridge that day...
The Motorcycle Ride -
Cyrus was an avid motorcycle enthusiast. When we first met he had a Kawasaki KZ400 - a medium-sized bike but plenty fast. I'd always wanted to learn to ride a motorcycle, but my parents never would have allowed it while I was living at home. So, I jumped at the chance when Cyrus offered to teach me to ride. He first took me to some small side roads in Berkeley where I could ride slowly and become familiar with the bike's controls. I remember that balancing the motorcycle was not much different than balancing a regular bicycle - you just had to be careful not to lean too far and lose control of the bike's weight. Initially, Cyrus rode on the back to guide me, but when I improved he let me ride solo around the streets of Berkeley and eventually across the Richmond Bridge to my home in Marin County.
The San Pedro Road begins at the east end of 3rd Street in San Rafael, California, just beyond the 101 freeway. It curves eastward along the coastline of the San Rafael Bay, goes through China Camp State Park, and ends back near the 101 freeway in Terra Linda. It's a long, winding loop about 10 miles long - a perfect motorcycle racetrack. Cyrus could ride the entire San Pedro loop without letting the bike speed drop below 50 miles per hour. When I first rode the loop solo on the KZ400, I remember wondering how he could possibly do this, as I would have to slow down to near 25 miles per hour on some of the tighter curves. Still, even at my slow speed, riding the San Pedro loop was tremendous fun!
Cyrus eventually traded in the KZ400 for a Kawasaki KZ1000, a total beast of a bike. I never rode it solo, but I rode on the back with Cyrus many times. I remember feeling the serious g-forces when he'd open it up on the freeway onramp. One day, Cyrus took me on the KZ1000 around the San Pedro loop. This was absolutely better than any theme park roller coaster ride I had ever been on! I remember him telling me to just lean with him into the curves and hold on. It was pure exhilaration interspersed with moments of terror! We approached some of those curves so fast I had no idea how we were going to get around them, but Cyrus never missed a beat and we emerged in Terra Linda unscathed. Cyrus had serious motorcycle-riding skills; I am sure he could have ridden competitively if he had wanted to. When I climbed off the back of the KZ1000 after that crazy thrill ride, Cyrus said something like "Sorry - I was taking it a bit easy because you were on the back"...
The Lysol Caper -
At International House in Berkeley, Cyrus and his roommate lived next to a couple of guys whose room smelled really, really bad. I don't know what the deal was with these two guys, but when you walked by their room, even when the door was closed, it was like "whoa, what the.." It was truly awful! If you happened to be passing their room and heard the door start to open, you just ran for dear life. Well, one day Cyrus and I were walking by when their door handle started to turn, and we decided to hold our breath, stand our ground and try to see inside. The two guys emerged, we said hi, and we got a quick peek in. We didn't see anything unusual, but Cyrus noticed that their window was open a bit. He then devised an ingenious plan - it was classic Cyrus, all the way! First, he bought a king size can of Lysol and then waited until the two guys went to class. Then, he climbed out his window onto the ledge, about two stories up, crawled over to their window, and emptied almost the entire Lysol can into their room! Cyrus achieved legendary status on his floor after that stunt. I'm afraid of heights so I never could have done it! A day or two later, someone heard the two guys talking. One was complaining to the other that their room smelled bad... :)
The Pool Party -
One summer, Cyrus had the idea of organizing a party at my house in San Rafael, California. I believe it was the summer of 1980, after my first year of medical school and before Cyrus went away to Boston University. My mom had done some major upgrades to our house, including a big swimming pool with a separate Jacuzzi and a large wooden deck that overlooked the pool and backyard. I was a bit apprehensive at first because until then, the only parties I had ever had at my house were some very sparsely attended ones when I was a grade schooler. I think my mom had to bribe the other parents into forcing their kids to show up... But, Cyrus was persistent and so the date was set. Ultimately, everything came together perfectly on that day. Cyrus brought about ten of his friends - I remember Ravi Thomas, Bruce, Jesse Little (now Jesse Divergilio), and several others. We had a barbecue out back, and I had my sound system hooked up with Infiniti speakers out on the deck powered by a heavy duty Adcom amp and preamp. Ravi manned the barbecue and cooked up all kinds of tasty chicken and burgers, and there was no shortage of beer. I think Bruce was the DJ and blasted all kinds of great music out over the pool. I remember the Rolling Stones' Hot Rocks collection, the Grateful Dead Rose album, Led Zeppelin IV, Dire Straits first record (a big time favorite of Cyrus and his friends), and many more. We ate, drank, socialized, played some water polo, relaxed in the jacuzzi, and generally just had a terrific time. The party absolutely could not have gone any better! My last vivid image of that day, after most of the people had left, was of me standing on the deck with Jesse, thinking how terrific she looked and trying to get up the nerve to ask her out on a date while hoping she didn't look down at my feet because my toenails were way too long - ha ha! TMI maybe, but hey, that's how it was. To this day, I'm still not sure if she noticed them...
It was a perfect afternoon. After it ended, I do remember thinking "Man, this was ALL Cyrus..."
Cyrus and I finally met again in March of last year, almost 40 years after I had last seen him! I had spoken to Cyrus and Katie on the phone a few times during the preceding year, and so when Cyrus and Jenny came out to California, Katie set up a Sunday brunch date for us at the 1 Pico Restaurant in the Shutters Hotel in Santa Monica.
As I was driving to the meeting that day from my house in Orange County, I was so excited that I had trouble staying focused on the road. I arrived at the restaurant before Cyrus and family, and as I paced around outside waiting for them, I felt like a little on kid Christmas morning waiting to open his presents. Even after 40 years, I had no absolutely no apprehension about seeing Cyrus and Jenny again - I just new that they would both be the same kind, wonderful people that I remembered that that we would pick up again just like old friends. And - that is exactly what happened! I gave them both a big hug outside the restaurant, met Katie for the first time, and we all went inside and ate and just talked for hours. It really felt like Cyrus, Jenny and I had never been apart, and that I had known Katie all my life.
Biologists and psychologists have extensively studied the concept of fun - what happens emotionally and physiologically when someone does something enjoyable. All agree that during such an experience, focus of concentration, emotional intensity, dopamine release in the brain, and other events almost always alter the perception of the passage of time. So, basically, the old cliche is really true - time does fly when you're having fun!
Well, it sure flew by for me that day... we had 40 years of catching up to do, and I could have talked to Cyrus, Jenny, and Katie until afternoon the next day - it just went by so fast!
It was magical day for me - one I'll never forget. I wish I had reached out sooner.
Jenny, Katie, Alex and family - I wish I could take away some of the pain you're feeling right now, but I know I can't - my heart goes out to all of you. What I can do is share these stories in celebration of Cyrus' life and give a big shout out to everyone in recognition of what a terrific, kind, fun, charismatic and totally irreplaceable person Cyrus was and of what a privilege it was to know him.
This world was a much better place with Cyrus in it. And, because of all he did and everyone he touched, it will forever be a much better place because he was here.
I'm very, very sad. I'm going to miss my friend.
Rest in peace Cyrus.
Mike B.
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