While I’ve know my brother-in-law Cy for 30 years, our connection really strengthened over the past couple of years while he was in the depths of his struggles with alcohol. I think I always saw beyond the “charismatic life of the party Cy”, to the vulnerable, sensitive, tender-hearted Cy because I could relate to that side of him. I remember a time about 20 years ago when he was gifted a new fancy fishing pole from his Dad while we were at their lake house. As a 20-something on a budget that rod brought him such joy and excitement as he anticipated the camping trips he’d bring it along on. Unfortunately somehow that rod snapped in two the day he received it. The look of sadness and disappointment on Cy’s face and tear that welled in his eye stayed with me. Since living in California I’ve spent a lot more time with him, and have seen that look again and again. It’s the same look he’d get when he had to say good-bye to his brother, cousin, or friend that lived far away, the same look when he talked about his under privileged students who deserved better, the same look when someone was discriminated against for their race, sexual orientation, religion, etc., the same look when the unhoused person who needed a place rest came to his door, the same look when he heard about his beloved Boundary Waters in MN being threatened.

Highly sensitive people are special. We feel things so deeply that our joys are exemplified, but unfortunately so are our hardships. This is both a gift and a burden. Many times it springs us into action, sometimes the weight of that burden leads to unhealthy coping mechanisms, especially if you’ve always been a proud, independent individual. The lesson here is keep your heart soft, spirit generous, and your mind open like Cy, but never suffer in silence when things get too heavy. Ask for help. Cy was loved and cherished near and far by people from every walk of life, and they would have done anything to lighten his load had they been given the chance. I love you, Cy. The only comfort I feel now is knowing you’re in complete peace.❤️🥹