I first met Ben 17-18 years ago when I was at Wharton and he was researching business schools. He came across immediately as someone who was very smart, but humble, extremely capable, fun, ambitious, but most of all just a really good guy. Accordingly, we put the full court press on him to join us in Philadelphia. Sadly for us, he instead went to another, equally prestigious program, but we stayed in contact and became friends. I loved hearing from him every once in a while and getting glimpses of his life. In him I found someone who really saw the world the same way I did. He was always so full of life and energy, always looking to know how he could help, always thinking of his next big idea, even while working hard at whatever his current job was. But ultimately, he was someone who knew there was more to life than just career and money and to find joy in the journey.
More than once we laughed together as we related to each other decisions we had made that that turned us away from situations that would have made us a lot wealthier than we were. It was a mildly rueful but positive and confident shrug and laugh that we shared. To be sure, he was extremely motivated towards success, and never stopped working and thinking and planning, but he knew that life was more than that and he was a perpetually happy person.
On a business trip to Waco, I brought my wife along with me and we made a stop in Austin to see Ben and Aprilanne. We had some great BBQ at Terry Black's, but what I remember most is sitting there for literally hours after we had finished eating, talking and laughing, until the restaurant was empty and the staff was sweeping the floors. About a year later we were in the midst of moving our family to the Middle East and urgently needed to get certification stamps of vital documents in several states. Ben was happy to receive them, hand carry them to the Texas State Capitol to get the stamps in person, and then overnight them back to me in California. He scoffed at any payment and was stoked to help, because that's who he was.
In the past 14 months since we returned from the Middle East and settled in Dallas, we spoke more often than we did before. I loved talking to him and hearing about what he had going on. He was always focused on how he could help me in my job search, even when I was not in a hurry to start working again. He and I related to each other so much and, as usual, he was working hard at his job, had another venture he owned and wanted to talk about, and still held everything in the proper balance and priority. The last time I talked to him he excitedly told me about at least FOUR additional ideas he had for businesses or ventures he wanted to explore. In that conversation we also happily mapped out who we could introduce each other to from our respective networks, which we had of course done before. That's who he was.
I didn't know him as well as many do and I'm bummed that we never lived close enough to see each other very often. Sadly, in our last call we assured each other that now that we only lived a few hours apart, we'd for sure see each other soon and more often. But that will have to wait.
Another friend said it right when he texted me that "Ben really did seem like he could do it all." As I drove down through the rain and traffic today from Dallas to Austin, I thought of how privileged I was to know him. I thought a lot about this mortal life, and I reflected on what I can do better in my life that would make me more like Ben. That list is long.
Aprilanne and kids, we love you so much. We know you will be together eternally with Ben in love and happiness.
Ben, rest in peace buddy. I can't wait to hear the next slate of ideas you think of. God be with you, until we meet again.