As one of the "little cousins", I always held Paul, Phil, and Mark in high regard as the "cool cousins." I remember Paul always being a focal point of quick witted banter amongst his family and our extended family, and at the same time I was able to see his kind and caring side, always looking out for how to be inclusive of those that weren't "plugged in," especially us younger cousins.

When our family visited Pella in the mid '80s for ??Mark's graduation from high school?? (wow, a cousin that walked *on his hands* down the aisle! Can these guys be any cooler to a 9-10 year old??), one thing I remember is Paul inviting us to go out for "Night Frisbee Golf" at a park with glow-in-the-dark frisbees. What a cool guy to include the "little cousins". And wow a "glow-in-the-dark frisbee" that we kept re-charging by holding it to the light in the picnic shelter by itself was more than enough to capture my fascination.

I hadn't really played frisbee much before that night, but I certainly played *a lot* of frisbee over the next years with my brother. We put our cow brands on the back of our frisbees because we didn't have cool enough initials to use something like the π symbol :-) And "creating our own frisbee golf courses" has always been more fun than pre-set courses. More chance for convoluted twists and turns.

Paul and Lori have been active supporters of ours over the last 15 years as we lived in Sudan and then in Ethiopia. My kids were a bit young in Sudan, but in Ethiopia we created multiple "frisbee golf courses" that were a lot of fun. Too bad we didn't have a glow-in-the-dark frisbee there, it would have added to the fun. The tradition goes on down the line, but it started (for me!) with Paul and his cool brothers on a visit to Pella.

Lori, Uncle Thomas and Aunt Diane, Luke (and family), Rachel, Phil, and Mark,

I can't pretend to know the grief that comes with Paul's passing: I know his loss will be felt in your relationships, in simple day-to-day logistics, and in deeper ways than can be expressed and that you may not even see now or even for many years to come. I pray that you will hold to his memory and continually honor him through all the challenging times and also all the joyous times to come, remembering all that he has given to each of you over the years and how he has contributed to who each of you are today.

Dear Lori, Rachel & Luke,

I was a coworker of Paul’s at productOps. I have been following this memorial of Paul since his passing. It is both heartwarming and heart breaking.

One thing is for sure, my relationship and experiences with Paul were not unique. He was an incredible person and such a nice presence in our office. He was always there to offer a lunch date when he knew I was struggling. Or, with a complimentary email or note to recognize something I had done. It felt so good because his opinion was so valuable. He also never took center stage; he left that space available for everybody else.

As you know very well, he was an incredibly special human. I guarantee there isn’t a person who had an interaction with him that feels otherwise.

I offer my deepest condolences to you and everybody in Paul’s family.

Sincerely,

Ryan

Dear Lori ,

My deepest condolences. Paul was truly a wonderful man and I’m so sorry for your loss.  

Love, Fran 

I offer, here, some photos from those tumultuous high school, college, and grad school years that I shared with Paul.

What can I say of my friend Paul? He was certainly wacky or, as we termed it, a "weed", perhaps the only flowering plant in an otherwise conventional green yard. Who else would have thought of wielding a ruler and wearing a tennis racket cover and bed sheet for Halloween? And that is only one example of dozens of such photos of Paul that I could have offered. I don't think that it ever occurred to him to worry about what other people thought. He was amongst the most genuine souls I've ever known. In retrospect, I think that it's probably better to call Paul an enthusiast. He threw himself into everything he did. He didn't just watch lacrosse; he bought the gear, he trained, he studied the game - he was all in.

Beneath all that, though, he was a thoughtful man, on every level: a razor sharp mathematician, a deeply spiritual man, and also, I must admit, more mindful of relationships than I ever was. After we had each gotten married and way had led onto way, he was the one who reached out and brought college buddies back together. He was the one, who, on the last day I believe I ever saw him, wouldn't accept just a good-bye handshake. "That's not going to be good enough" he said. And he gave me a hug that I will remember to the end of my days.

My deepest wishes of comfort and peace to you, Lori, Rachel, Luke, Phil, Mark, Diane, Tom, and family. Paul was a good man, my best man, a man who left an indelible mark on my life. Wait for me at the eastern gate, brother. If you'll let me, I'd love to join, just for a moment, that dance of wild abandon.