Free Grief Support - Loss Of A Child | Ever Loved

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In the last 15 years I have lost my beautiful parents my incredible aunt and uncle another uncle I was very close to also I lost 3 younger brothers and of course my son my heart broke s ripped apart I am the oldest of 8 children and my son had just turned 22
11 days prior my brothers were all in their 40 s I have 1 brother left every day my fear of losing someone else is so bad thank you for listening by the way all of them died of different things

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Hope Im doing this correctly , as I read the post I started to cry, I can only imagine what your going through. I lost my son on May 1, 2020 he would’ve been 30 years old February 13 of 2021 . Losing a parent is heart breaking, a sibling I’m sure the same. Losing a child is this most painful thing a person can go through. For me it was Physical pain as if someone reached in just below my rib cage and ripped out a piece of my soul. I feel a void, a piece of me missing and nothing will ever be right again. As dumb as this is going to sound I’m going to say it anyways just in case it may help you. My daughter force me to watch a documentary called “ The Secret” . The point of the documentary is the power of the mind and how your inner feelings cause you to think about things, dwell on things that you actually will bring them to existence .
The documentary helped me I also found a lot of on YouTube that I would just listen to during the day as I focused on breathing and not taking my own life. There’s is woman ( Suzanne giesemann ) on YouTube that also has a lot of information that may help with questions you might think about.
My son reached out to everyone in the family after he passed and still does. Knowing that he can hear me, knowing he is with me so mush of the time, I can’t wait to die to see him again.
As crazy as I sound, if I had video in my home after his passing I would have no money worries again. I have friends that no longer visit me due to the activity that goes on, which i’m so used to it now it’s just a part of my life I hope that you have also been blessed with your loved ones near It can be the most comforting thing that gets you through this.
Please excuse any misspellings or grammar mistakes I am trying to do this from my iPhone that I can barely see.

Dear Sandra,
Thank you so much for your info I m going to look for that documentary but honestly with 2 of my brothers it was like losing 2 more children I know I will never be ok but I do handle my feelings when my kids and grandkids are around they help me so much and yes my son is always with me and yes I know when I go I will be with my loved ones too I do not have a doubt I n my mind but I lost 3 brothers but the 2 younger ones I was always taking care of growing up my mom had 8 kids in 10 years with me being the oldest I always had them yes my son is absolutely the worst pain I could have ever imagined and it goes on everyday also feel that too a part of my heart and soul died that day too I m so sorry for your loss also honestly we have a connection through pain

Your absolutely correct, we do have a connection through pain. I have friends that find it hard to empathize with me, because they have not experienced a loss of a very close loved one and it’s awkward to be around them.
I do know what you mean about taking care of your brothers while growing up, I did the same for my sister I was seven years old cleaning and cooking. She was 5 years old. I’m sure your brothers had a much stronger bond with you since your not only a sister but also a mother. They were and still are blessed to have two moms. I refuse to speak about someone in a past tense because they are truly still here with us.

Yesterday I went to get a pedicure and as I was sitting there I was telling the girl that I was from Philly but moved 3 years ago so it just so happens the lady in the chair next to me said she was from Philly too we continue to talk and here she is a self healer she has written a book I m not sure what a self healer is but I have her number and someday I am going to check out what she does the purpose of me saying this is I believe my son sent me there to meet her

I'm so so sorry for your losses and the loss of your still young son. My youngest of 6, took his 21 year old life on September 10th and I can barely see straight. He should have turned 22 on Sept 29th so I had his memorial service that night. I have moments where I think "I can't believe I'm still here and going through this" but I am and heard someone on YouTube say that every day that we make it through is one day closer to seeing them again. I'm old enough to be okay with that but don't know how much consolation it would be if I was much younger. : )


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